Frustrated with DH - Advice?

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Registered: 11-05-2008
Frustrated with DH - Advice?
13
Wed, 02-23-2011 - 11:24pm

To start, (though some here may disagree) I think I have the best baby every born and a pretty wonderful DH.

So, each week, I have a special day that is just me and Logan and DH has a day that is just him and Logan. The problem is that when I get home from work on his days, all I hear is griping about how difficult Logan has been. He doesn't want to play with me. He won't nap. He just spent all day fussing. He won't leave the (very little, delicate) dog alone. I will give him that since that dog goes to work with DH I am almost never alone with DS and the dog. However, I don't get the rest. My DCP and her family, and everyone else who has ever babysat him has commented on what a fun and easy baby he is! I know sometimes people sugarcoat things for the mom but still. I don't have difficulty with him 90% of the time. Sure he has some fussy times like any baby but they tend to be minimal. Now, he is our first child (and DH has never spent much time around any children of any ages) so we have little to compare but from all that I have heard he is truly easy.

Siggie

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Registered: 11-05-2008
Sat, 04-30-2011 - 10:16pm

No, no dr but all around things are getting better. I am just busy. DH is too. The not forcing playtime would be great if asking DH to keep an eye on him while I showered or something didn't result in DH watching tv and DS just running around crying and looking for me. Even though I have said it I don't think that DH gets it that if his attention wasn't split between DS and the tv (or even more on the tv) that DS would not be running around looking for me because he would be having a good time with Daddy. He thinks if DS is not directly involved in a game with him (like catch or reading) DS isn't interested in his attention or spending time with him. He misses the fact that even if DS is doing something on his own, he keeps looking to check that DH (or I or whoever is taking care of him) is still there and seeing what he is doing. He doesn't realize that indirect interaction is still very important to DS.

Like I said they have been doing better together most of the time. Now when he has a bad day with DS it seems more like the normal, these happen once in a while kind of things. Either he is not at the top of his game or Ds isn't. Heck, I think we all have a frustrating day with the kid here and there, but for several months it was every time they were together.

For the record, DH and I have 1 day every other week that is just he and I while DS is at daycare, and alternate weekends we have family time for the weekend. But that is the extent of the days DH and I have off together.

Siggie
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2007
Sun, 05-01-2011 - 12:15pm
Men! They JUST don't always seem to quite get it, do they?

Tessa
Single Mom of 6 beautiful children and 3 angels........
CL to Single Moms, January 2010 Winter Wonders, and 2010 Playgroup Friends
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-05-2008
Sun, 05-01-2011 - 11:04pm

Yeah! But I love mine and want him to be happy. I think he is one of the good ones and there are not a ton of those out there! :) I think when DS get out of the parallell play stage and more into the more play with

Siggie

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