I swear that my pain and swelling has doubled overnight.
Made with My Cool Signs.Net
I am 27 weeks today! I thought that the 3rd T started at 28 weeks, at least that what my OB goes by. Either way, it's close enough! I have been feeling REALLY achy in my pelvic bone area...kind of like when baby drops towards the end. I definately "feel" like I am more around 33-35 weeks, but I am trying to keep myself busy and keep my mind off of that:)
Oh yes totally feeling it now. I was feeling pretty good there for awhile thinking maybe it wouldn't be too bad, but I CAN'T SLEEP! AND I take meds to sleep!!! It does nothing! I have chronic insomnia to begin with but this just plain sucks. This pregnancy has been much harder than my first one. IDK why exactly, but I have been all over the place emotionally and depressed a lot. The depression is getting worse and I really don't know why because I haven't anything to be depressed about! I have a fantastic house, husband, daughter, family....what is wrong with me? Some days I really could just cry all day and my anxiety disorder has really gotten bad. Just when I thought we had gotten it under control, the pregnancy hormones come in and screw everything up.
I think I am also apprehensive being high risk because I had ICP (intrahepatic cholestasis of pregnancy) last time which is HORRIBLE let me tell you and it happens in the 3T so I am really nervous about when that is going to hit. I feel I am pretty much doomed to get it since my mom had it with all 5 of us (me being her first born at 30 weeks) and I had it with DD. I have a much better healthcare team this time around, but I m just so nervous!! I have to be induced again like I was with DD at 37 weeks and that in itself was a terrible experience and I wish I could just go into labor naturally. That would be so nice!
This time it's a boy, so maybe that has something to do with it? It looks like induction will be around July 14th or so and that seems like it's around the corner! SCARY! Definitely feeling that fear of going from having one to two kids...even though my mom had 5 and did fine and she never had any help.
It sounds like this PG has been pretty intense for you;
I swear I was waddling today. I kinda caught myself, and I though, "what the HECK is this all about?!? Isn't it too early?" Maybe not. Just today, I feel like this baby gained 5lbs, and my belly cannot stretch anymore. I have occasionally been measuring my "waist," and tonight, I was 2" bigger than just the other day. ??? I mean, it was the end of the day, blah blah blah, but c'mon! I still have 12 weeks! This baby has found his/her way under my ribs on the right side, and it can be kinda painful already. Hoping that doesn't get worse...
Thanks for your reply :). It REALLY helps to have you and all the ladies here. I am going to see my psychiatrist Monday to get lined up with a psychotherapist and possibly put on a short term dose of meds. I think I had what was a psychotic episode of depression. There are hours that I don't remember. I need to help myself before anything happens again. I am so scared and I feel so horribly guilty I could just cry for hours. But I need to be proactive and help myself. I can't beat myself up. My DH was there thank god and my parents too and I totally believe so was God. I'm not really hugely religious but He was definitely there beause last timet his happened I got into a car accident. It was when I had my miscarriage in October. My docs/midviwes from last time even asked me if I was sure I wanted to get preggo again. I didn't really want to go through it again but then again I did. Hard thing to explain! Don't worry I am going to get help ASAP so nothing else happens. If anything ever happened to DD because of me or my unborn baby, I don't know how I would live with myself. I hope my unborn baby is ok. I am terrified of that. He is constantly active and hasn't given me a reason to worry but I did do something that could theoretically have hurt him. I hope I don't get judged because of this :( I'm so so so unhappy with myself and what happened and so guilty. It's hard to sleep already but this episode has made it nearly impossible because I can't stop thinking about it. My mom has been VERY helpful and supportive since it happened and so has my dad. It's just hard because people do judge no matter what they say. I KNOW I screwed up bad. I am taking steps and have been since it happened to get better and to make sure it NEVER EVER happens again. It just still hurts so much inside that I could have EVER done anything to scare my little DD and my DH and my family. I NEVER want that to happen again and I am going to make sure it won't. The pregnancy I just have to take a day at a time because it is so hard this time. My body just does NOT like being pregnant, even the doc told me that LOL. I'm worried about the cholestasis because it is just awful and it presents a risk of still birth or intrauterine fetal death. I am so scared. DD made it but my mom lost my sister to it. I don't want to lose my little William. I love him so much already.
Thanks so much for your encouragement.....it helps so much.
Oh and the breastfeeding thing...OY. I really don't want to tandem! BUt she all of a sudden has shown so much renewed interest when I though we were almost weaned...arghh. IDK what I am gonna do so I guess I just have to fly by the seat of my pants....so to speak LOL