First day of daycare tomorrow...getting nervous

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2004
First day of daycare tomorrow...getting nervous
6
Sun, 09-11-2011 - 6:56am

Jack starts going to daycare tomorrow and I'm getting REALLY nervous after my visit there on Friday. It's the same place that my older two went to, so I was really looking forward to Jack going since I absolutely love the woman who runs it. However, I stopped by on Friday afternoon to pick up his paperwork and the four older kids who go there now were absolutely CRAZY WILD. They were running around, screaming, kicking each other, slapping each other. One of them knocked the little two year old girl down on the ground and then ran off screaming at the top of his lungs that she was a "stupid stupid ugly head". I looked at the daycare provider with wide eyes and she goes "Yup, they are like this EVERY day...I don't know what to do anymore". I guess she talks to the parents, but they just sort of laugh it off as them being kids. Now, I'm really surprised because this daycare provider is really no-nonsense so I'm thinking if she can't even control them, then how bad is this going to be and if they are so rough, is Jack going to be ok??? I know she's always watching them and all, but what about when she has to make lunch or snacks or something? My DD was with me during the visit and afterward she told me that one of the boys used to pick on a little baby that also goes there (he's about 15 months old now and wasn't there on that day) and that he used to throw things at him. Great, just what I need to hear when MY baby is supposed to start going there tomorrow. I would hate to just yank him out (especially since I don't really have a backup at the moment) but I know I'm just going to be so nervous with him being there and having these kids be so wild. Not to mention that the daycare provider asked me what Jack's nap schedule was like and I told her he normally naps from about 11-2 and she was thrilled, except I have to say I doubt he's going to take a long nap with that kind of noise. I mean, he will sleep through SOME noise but not four screaming children. Oh and the two year old girl is very clingy and the provider told me that she has a hard time putting her down...so how is she going to be able to take care of Jack if she has a two year old attached to her at all times?

I am just really freaking out. I didn't have one single worry about sending him off to daycare seeing as how my older two did so wonderfully there, but now I guess I sort of understand why DD hated going there after preschool all last year. I thought she was being dramatic, but if that's how things are all day-no wonder she used to fight my mom at dropoff time. Ugh, I dont' know what to do. Maybe I'm jumping the gun, but you can bet I will be watching this like a hawk...and I think I might even start looking around just in case I need to pull him out. I know "kids will be kids" but if you had seen what I saw, you'd probably feel the same.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2006
I can totally understand your concern. And not having another option doesn't help. Personally - and I'm not trying to make your concerns worse - but I'd probably start looking ASAP for another option.

We have a couple of nanny / sitter services in our area. They start at $7 / hour and can provide a full-time nanny (priced differently). You might look at something like that if you decide you need to make a quick change after the first couple of days.

But - since you do have experience with this lady and she does know you - try being honest with her about your concerns and ask her directly how she plans to care for such a young baby when she clearly has more than she can handle with the older kids.

I hope it all works out. Do you have someone who can "drop in" and check on things tomorrow during the middle of the day? I'd really like to know how things were going when she wasn't expecting a visitor, kwim?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2004

You know I was actually thinking about a nanny for this reason as well as for the fact that I'd love to have someone who'd be available to stay home with my older two when they get sick. Last year, my DS had this weird virus that wouldn't go away and he missed 17 days of school...needless to say, I lost a lot of sick time and it really made things tough on my class because I was out so much between him being sick and my excessive morning sickness. I thought a nanny would be great because I'd always have a back up plan...even if it meant paying that person more to stay with them, at least I wouldn't be panicking all the time. I think it's something I will have to strongly consider. SO even tried to switch to nights at his job, but they really like him in the position he's in (which I guess is good for him) and won't let him switch.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2011
OMG my mommy radar was screaming NO DON'T SEND him!!! But when you do not have another option i guess that is wht happens (

I am glad thing went ok for him. i think you are right abt the little napping....toomuch noise :(

Daycare makes me nervous all the way around. I like the idea of a nanny!! Do you have a college in your town? Maybe you ca find a nanny there if you do not have a nanny service in your area.

I would look for a pre-K teacher or Elem ed student...........i dunno why but tht would be an option.
I hope you find someone/someplace soon :)
Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2004

No, we don't have a college nearby, but that would be a great idea! We've gotten through day 2 and things seem to be going alright. He won't nap for her, but today he did sleep for about an hour on her while she sat on the couch. Luckily the other kids were napping so she was able to just sit there, but I'm sure she can't do that every day. Maybe once he's in a routine. I don't know. If I hadn't had such good experiences with her with my older two, I would definitely be freaking out...but I'm still a tad uncomfortable just the same. I guess I just need to see how it goes for a little bit.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2008

liz, how many children to adult does your provider have? If she's alone, she has way too many children and you should have less children with newborns/infants.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2004

She has six and she's licensed to have six while having one infant. We've had a pretty good week, so I'm crossing my fingers that it goes alright. I'd hate to lose her since she practically raised my other two. And two of the other kids (the really rowdy oness) will be in kindergarten next year, so I am looking on the positive side that at least they won't have time to teach Jack any of their bad behaviors. The other two aren't really a HUGE problem and they probably get most of it from their older brothers so maybe once those kids are in school, things will be much calmer.

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