Anyone else feeling guilty because they can't breastfeed?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2004
Anyone else feeling guilty because they can't breastfeed?
Fri, 05-13-2011 - 4:23pm

I tried to breastfeed my oldest and ended up being told by the lactation consultant that we needed to switch over to formula because she couldn't breastfeed and my milk supply was low.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004

DON'T feel bad at all!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2008
There are a crazy amount of allergies these days, google it, there's a lot to be said for today's environment and less to be said about it coming from not breastfeeding. At the end of the day you have to do what's best for you because that's what truly makes for healthy children. I believe there's a whole lot of bullying where breastfeeding is concerned (and I am someone who believes in breastfeeding). I had a SUPER low supply, we have no idea why, I have huge boobs and my mom was able to breastfeed all of us (there were three) with plenty to spare. I felt inadequate even though there's nothing that I could have done differently (tried the herbal enhancers, pumping, etc).
Lilypie Maternity tickers
Avatar for ribrit
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2001

Don't feel guilty about it at all. I nursed my children all a decent amount of time. But one of them, who I nursed for 2.5 yrs, I was on medications the entire time, and he ended up with neuro type problems! It will affect him the rest of his life. Formula is not so bad. In fact, I did not even want to nurse my last baby. I had such horrible complications from the birth, I could not nurse him for a while. But then, later, my husband was fed up with the bottles and told me to nurse him. My milk did not come in until 3 weeks. I was glad I had nursed him for some time. Especially since there was a huge nasty formula recall when he was a few months old. But, he is 20 months old now and I CANNOT seem to wean him. My nipples hurt so bad. I am seriously considering just not nursing the next one. I don't know. That would probably be pretty weird to be nursing the 2 yr old but bottle feeding the newborn.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2006
I wouldn't feel bad if I were you.
You can only do what is safe/right for you.
IMO, some kids are just going to have allergies. I think there are SO many factors OTHER than breastfeeding.

I breastfed my now 4 year old for about 4 weeks and supplemented formula as well. It was probably the longest 4 weeks of my life and I just could not physically or emotionally do it. I don't know if it was because I was so young (barely 22 at the time) but as much as I loved the bond of BFing I knew that my sanity was more important and I could still get that bond while bottle feeding and just snuggling.

I agree with PPer about not even looking at articles, etc about breastfeeding. You can't beat yourself up for taking care of yourself with your meds first and giving your baby formula instead of breast milk. He'll be fine :)
- Caroline

* Wife of Eric (July 28, 2007)

* Proud Mommy of Allison Kathleen (April 14, 2007)

* Expecting another BABY GIRL on September 16, 2011

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2002

I'm going to throw some ideas out there because you may find it helps ease the guilt(which you shouldnt feel at all)..Sure breastmilk is meant for human babies and is the ideal food..but lots of women don't breast feed for one reason or other..With my first son..I couldnt get him to latch properly and felt horrible that he wouldnt feed..I used a pump and pumped for a while but the schedule wore me out and I finally switched him to formula..With my second son..he latched fine and I had no supply issues but have severe bipolar disorder and needed to be back on my meds post baby..With this baby..I won't actively breastfeed because I have a complex with anyone or anything putting their mouth any where near my breasts..grosses me right out..I may try a pump again if its not too nasty feeling but if not my baby will get formula..So you could use a pump and bottle feed your milk to the baby..also there is a med out there that aids in lactation..certain foods are known to boost milk supply...last but not least formula or combo feed..some women make milk but not very much so they pump what they can and supplement with formula..those are all good option..but don't let anyone from ivillage or elsewhere make you feel your doing you or your baby an injustice by not breastfeeding..its youre body..your decision.

 BabyFruit Ticker
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2011
breast feeding is great and can lower the risk but doesn't mean that your child won't get allergies and stuff, I breastfed for almost 10 months and DD still has bad food allergies and seasonal allegies, so don't fel guilty do whats best for you.