My sister wants to get pregnant, what a nightmare!(long)

Avatar for ribrit
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2001
My sister wants to get pregnant, what a nightmare!(long)
3
Sun, 05-08-2011 - 11:03am

My younger sister is 38 yrs old. She has not been the best mother. She has relied on others to take care of her children by the time they are 1 week old on. She also has to have a high life style, so even though she is a public school teacher, with a husband who has been mostly unemployed their entire marriage, she has to have luxury SUVs with all leather interior, which she cannot drive anything older than 2 or so years old so she is always trading them in. She will not allow her children to even wear handmedowns, from themselves. They have to have entire new wardrobes each season. But she cannot afford any of it so our parents buy it all for her. (then blame me, she claims she has to keep up with me and the people in the town I live in as I live in a wealthier town, but no one I know here does this). With her other children, I used to get calls all the time that I have to give her money, even though we are not made of money. I would get told because I am just sitting around all day doing nothing (I am a SAHM, hardly sitting around doing nothing), I need to take care of her children. Her children would be in daycare all day (paid for by our parents) and then picked up at the end of the day by our parents or her inlaws or someone else. Fridays, they would be picked up by our parents often and then passed off to her inlaws later in the day Saturday and she would get them back Sunday nights. But she was off work by 2-3pm and the daycares did not close until 6:30pm. My sister does not do drugs or anything, she is just very spoiled and in to herself and just expects everyone else to do for her. Now, at this point, our parents would not be capable of taking care of the new baby is she has one. Our dad has dementia and our mom just is incredibly lazy and disabled.

Avatar for ribrit
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2001

Oh, and I forgot, everytime she gets pregnant, she claims it was an accident. It just adds to the dramatics and gives her more of an excuse to not be responsible for her actions and her child. I guarantee that in a few months, when I post she is pregnant, she will be saying it is an accident.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2006

wow..that sounds like a very messy situation..Just from what Ive heard she reminds me of my sister in law..every time I got pregnant so did she...and when I decided I was done having babies she had to outdo me and have another..well 3 yrs after my last I am having number three and she's on number 5..and she's only 23 yrs old..I can't handle ppl like that..Try to enjoy your pregnancy and know you'll be a good mother no matter how dismal she is.

 BabyFruit Ticker
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2011

Wow.. what a family! Sorry your having to go through this.. My sister in law was the same way. Shes adopted so how she see is it her kids aren't biologically related to DH's parents.. where as My childern are. So with my first she was telling me Mom wasn't going to do this or do that.. and i shouldn't expect this..but when DS got here.. she did JUST THAT! With my second DH would take belly pics and post them all over facebook or myspace. It was hist first child and he was very excited.. well with my 12 weeks photo we got attacked with her complain about how some women can't have kids and its not right ot rub it in their face. Then I found out she had her IUD removed and been trying for 3 months and no success so she was sending her DH to get test mind you at that point she had 2 childern of her own.. so they didn't have any problems.. she just wasn't patient and let God do his magic. Dh and I never cared who was pregnant or not.. we just focused on what was best for our babies.. So when I go pregnant this time around.. I didn't tell ANYONE in his family till i was almost 14 weeks! Im also not revealing the sex even though Ill find out in just a few weeks. I barely talk to her.. and i blocked every one of his family memebers from my facebook and told them i deleted the entire account. Since I dont really chit chat.. I no longer get nasty calls or being accused of being rude.. if they do call I check my caller id.. and put the phone back down if the DONT stop calling.. I text DH to catch me on fb or messenger Im turning the cell off.. but sicne then we got a house phone and only him and I know the number so when it rings I know its my hubby.

I would take a back burner seat and just watch her life crumble you dont HAVE TO help. especially when you have a family of your own. So just ignore the calls. and the nasty messages and know your an amazing mom!