OT: Parent Stress
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|Tue, 07-05-2011 - 5:36pm|
I'm fairly certain I've talked about how not thrilled my mother is by my marriage and my pregnancy. Her (and my father's) behavior has really been the last straw in a long, abusive history. So, my husband and I wrote a letter asking that they both apologize for a very specific list of attracious things that really crossed the line, or we (including my kids) did not need to be a part of their lives.
After a month or so of putting off-type responses, like sending an email to us saying "I don't know how to send an email" and my mother telling me she will write a letter, only to say that she doesn't have time or can't read anymore. So, she has decided to leave a series of obnoxious voicemails, calling my cell phone over and over at odd hours to leave 4-5 minute voicemails talking about her wanting to be a composer or how her eye appointment went or the now common - how I'm hurting my son by not letting him see her (this same women who calls me names and has slapped me in front of my son before).
Today, she finally left a message that kinda related to the lettter my husband and I sent. She said that he and I have communication and anger issues and that we "never make sure that what a person says is what they actually mean." She then goes on to talk about how she never compared my dh to my abusive ex-husband she merely said "it was just like [the abusive ex-husband] again" and then, proceeded to try to place blame on me sayng that I make things up (actually chortling when she said that part). She also said that my dad's doctors won't let him talk to us becuase they read our letter (which was firm but not overtly angry) and said that contacting me is a danger to him and she threw in that her doctors have said the same thing.
I've asked her to just talk to me and my husband over the phone. And, all we want to hear is an apology. But, she says there are "too many parameters on that." The only parameter is that both he and I be on the phone and she get to the point instead of talking for 3 hours about nonesense that is completely unrelated. And, in her last voicemail, she stated that I'm harming my 4 yr old by pulling him out of preschool becuase he'll be labeled and can't possibly get an education while at home, and she knows we can't afford this.
So, sorry for rambling on and on, but the question is: This all seems so super surreal and crazy. I'm just completely ready to cut off all contact with her and my father. I hate pulling people out of my son's life, but I feel like I have no other choice. She seriously sounds like she's gone off an extra peg or two since the last time I talked to her. I keep thinking it's dementia, but I'm also concerned about my dad. I guess I'm just looking for some type of 3rd party permission to just let go of all of this and not feel guilty about cutting them off.