Shower frustration

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2007
Shower frustration
Sat, 06-18-2011 - 12:11pm

So I'm probably just being a brat about this but I gotta vent. I'm not *expecting* anyone to throw me another shower. We had a huge one for DS, and we have pretty much everything we need. The only things that we really need are a crib, dresser, bedding set and baby girl clothes. I want a Moby wrap, a baby food maker, a new pack n' play, and a video monitor. We'd manage to buy those things ourselves, so it's not that big of a deal.

I pretty much know that something will be done for me as far as a shower goes. My cousin had a "sprinkle" when her daughter was born last year (she has a DS who is 4, so kind of the same situation). My mom, of course, hasn't said anything to me, even when I say we are going to buy certain items (like, "Why not just wait..." or anything). That kind of aggrivates me because IF she is going to have another shower, then I don't want to spend money on something that someone else is buying.

My DH sent me a text last night when he picked up DS that said he thought he walked in on my mom talking on the phone about a shower. She was talking about decorations, and the date coming up, and people needing to RSVP, yadda. When she saw him, she lowered her voice and just started giving "yes" and "no" answeres to whoever she was talking to. I thought that maybe she was talking about the 4th of July BBQ that they are having, but they never decorate for that....and why would she lower her voice when she saw DH?

Here's where I am kind of annoyed....I HATE surprises. I always have. My parents threw a surprise birthday party for me when I was a kid and it didn't go over well. I knew about my bridal shower. I knew about DS's baby shower. My mom wasn't happy about it, but that's just my personality. I know, I know, I'm a brat lol. At least with DS's baby shower I was working at 3 different stores at the time, so I used the excuse that I had 3 store managers to tell I needed the day off so I had to know. This time, I don't work Sundays so she could easily plan one for a Sunday. I just don't want to be surprised. I don't see what the big deal is, really. Most people I know have known when their showers are. My mom is just "traditonal" like that I guess.

/brattyness. Thanks for reading :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2011
Sun, 06-19-2011 - 4:35pm
so have you done a registry? I get why this would bother you i would not like to have my be a surprise. I wanna walk in ready, hair make up feeling good. Maybe call your mom!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2008
Mon, 06-20-2011 - 3:24am

Honestly, if it's bothering you, I would just straight out ask your Mom if she's planning a shower. At least that way you'll know one way or another. Good luck!


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2005
Mon, 06-20-2011 - 6:25pm

Ugh I too hate surprises!! I would ask your mom flat out if yall she's doing anything or not and then go from there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2006
Tue, 06-21-2011 - 12:12am
I'm with ya!!! I hate surprises, too! I want to know what I've got coming at me!!!!

Since it's your mom, I agree with some of the other posters, just ask her. Tell her you don't want to be buying stuff if someone may be getting it for you as a shower gift.

Good luck and let us know how it goes!
- Caroline

* Wife of Eric (July 28, 2007)

* Proud Mommy of Allison Kathleen (April 14, 2007)

* Expecting another BABY GIRL on September 16, 2011