Affording Adoption?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Affording Adoption?
12
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 11:55am

Hi everyone! My husband and I are going to be starting IVF in the next month or so, and I'm already thinking "what if this doesnt' work?"

Jemma (35) and DH, (37). Married October 13, 2007 and TTCing since April 2008. Dealing with PCOS, swollen tubes, and also MFI. Committing myself to getting healthy and losing weight in preparation for IVF later in 2012.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2008
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 12:03pm

I'm not sure if you are only open to a new born for adoption but DH and I are foster to adopt.

Lilypie Waiting to Adopt tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2009
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 12:09pm
I think a lot of people choose foreign adoptions in the US exactly cause they are cheaper - around half of that, according to some estimates. The total for a child under 5 in Brazil, where I live, for a US couple would be around 20k, and much less for a child over 5 as that is an expedited process, so the cost of staying here is reduced. I've seen similar figures for Eastern European countries by American parents, too.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 12:24pm

Thanks for the responses ladies!



Just a little backround...DH has an estranged brother he just recently got back in contact with after 15 years. My BIL was adopted by another family as a teenager-looong story, he was in Juvenile detention, foster care, then finally my MIL allowed him to be adopted. He was still in and out of their lives until he

Jemma (35) and DH, (37). Married October 13, 2007 and TTCing since April 2008. Dealing with PCOS, swollen tubes, and also MFI. Committing myself to getting healthy and losing weight in preparation for IVF later in 2012.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-18-2003
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 1:31pm

Hi Jem,



Have you ever bought a new car and made payments?

Cheryl, Mom to 3 year old Aeryn via adoption, TTC since 2003 and finally pregnant via Donor Egg!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2002
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 2:04pm

Welcome! I wish you the very best luck in your upcoming IVF cycle. So many of us here know how hard it can be.

We adopted our daughter through an agency - we were at the hospital within an hour of her birth and brought her home the next day!

I would estimate that our total cost for the adoption was around $15,000, which included agency fees, lawyer fees, etc. We were lucky to have been able to save the full amount. I realize not everyone can do this.

The adoption tax credit is very helpful. You still have to pay the expenses as they come up, but you can claim a large portion of it as a tax credit. (I'm not sure if the law has changed ... it was $11,500 I think?? Not sure what it might be now.)

Plus, remember that all the expenses don't come up at once. We signed up with our agency in April and paid a $150 fee ... then an $800 fee several months later ... and a "big" fee of about $7,500 when our home study was approved. The rest we didn't have to pay until way later.

Hope this helps!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 4:35pm

Welcome!

 


Lilypie Second Birthday tickers

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2008
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 4:51pm

Our domestic, newborn open adoption cost us about $18,000. However, after my company paying $10,000 and DH's company paying another $7,000, we actually had only $1000 our of pocket expense. More and more corporations (I worked for a non-profit) are paying something towards adoptions. We also did not pay anything up front but at the time we signed the papers and took our daughter home.

Our two older boys were foster-to-adopt and there was absolutely no cost for their adoption. The State covered it all. They were 5 and 7 at the time but we know quite a number of families that did foster-to-adopt with infants and toddlers. We, as many others, knew that we would be adopting them from the day they were placed in our home.

Wishing you luck on your path to parenthood, no matter which road you end up following!

Claire

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2009
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 5:47pm

Jem,



I just wanted to say I read your signature and am keeping my fingers crossed for you with IVF. My husband is also diabetic, but in our case, we don't have the choice of trying anything unless it involved donor sperm, and I opted against that. Of course, that makes me question if I'm doing the wrong thing by putting all my eggs in the adoption basket while I get older...

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2003
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 7:40pm

Will chime in and say that somehow, it works out. Our domestic agency adoption cost about $15k, everything included. We paid $1500, then $2500, then $7000 (roughly). We had fixed birth mother expenses, so we didn't have that as an added expense. Our agency worked on a sliding fee scale based on income - and for once I was happy to fall into the lowest category, even though I think we only made it by $500.

My in laws loaned us some of it, and for the rest we made big changes in our life to be able to save more money. We sold my car and got rid of a big car payment - we live in a large city, so I took the bus to work. Cut back on the cable, cell phone plans, grocery budget, no vacations. It worked! We all start out at the same place, not thinking we'd ever be able to do it.

And time and time again, it just seems to happen.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2007
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 11:14pm

Our story is a little different, but here goes. We had IF issues and didn't go as far as IVF, because neither of our insurances would pay ANY of it. So that was out due to the cost. ( I hope yours works :) )

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