I'm a mess, DD's a mess, please help...

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2006
I'm a mess, DD's a mess, please help...
19
Tue, 01-02-2007 - 12:27am

I hope I can write something that makes sense. DD is not sleeping well and my frustration tolerance is pretty low (due to lack of sleep, grief issues, holiday stressors etc). I don't know how much more of this I can handle. I've actually almost resorted to letting her CIO and I am really against that! To top it all off my Aunt passed away last week so we've started the new year off with yet another funeral in my family...

Anyway, Emma was going to sleep pretty easily (being rocked and/or nursed) until we went out of town to my in-laws before Christmas. She would hardly sleep there during the night without being held (that is ALWAYS the case during the day) but napped well during the day. After a couple of days at home she was doing better. Then we had Christmas with lots of family in town and she hardly napped with all the commotion and didn't sleep well at night either. Then last Thursday she actually STTN for the first time in a couple of months!

On Friday we started giving her rice cereal (about 2 tsp mixed with approx 1 oz formula) once a day as she hadn't had any solids yet. At this point I think she started fighting going to sleep both at night and during the day, but it could've been after Christmas but before we started solids. My memory is not good right now. I do recall thinking I should give her the cereal earlier in the day because the two night she had it at dinnertime she had problems going to sleep and/or staying asleep for very long. She also didn't nap well one day when she had cereal beforehand, but I can't say this is always the case.

Tonight I read Amy's comments in another post and it got me wondering:

"The solids may be the reason he is now waking more. Solids don't have as much calories and fat as breastmilk. They also can cause gas, stomach upset, and constipation, which all can cause baby to wake in the night. Basically, giving solids displaces the more calorie/fat dense BM and baby feels "full" but doesn't get what they need. So, they wake in the night because of this."

DD loves her cereal and was certainly ready for it. Could this be part of the problem though? Or could it even be that she needs more? She had started nursing every 2 hrs (instead of every 3) part of the time so I think she's going through a growth spurt.

Any help or advice or questions to clarify would be much appreciated.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker
Emma Easter

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-30-2003
Tue, 01-02-2007 - 7:12am

I'm sure others with better/more info will be along soon, but here are my thoughts. You have a lot of variables going on right now with Christmas visits and visitors, and your own state of mind over a loss, a possible growth spurt and then just starting solids on top of it. If I were you I would just stop the solids for a couple of weeks until things settle back down a bit. My inclination is to blame the solids, but there's so much else going on you can't really know. Since she's just over six months, another two weeks till solids won't mess her up too badly, but may give her a chance to get back on track sleepwise, so that when you do introduce them again, either it won't cause any problems or issues at all, or if it does cause problems, you'll be better able to recognize the solids as the source of the problem. Take out some of the guessing, minimize the number of variables. I posted in the earlier thread that you quoted, telling that person that my DS slept through the night from 10 weeks till 6 months. At six months he went through a growth spurt, nursing more in the day and nursing several times a night for a while, so it could be that, too.

Also, you mentioned using formula for the cereal. Had she had formula before? If not, I would look to that as a culprit given the number of ingredients it has and the potential for allergens/irritants there. Obviously if she has had formula before, this wouldn't be the case, but it could be the rice. And rice could be constipating. So, if you really don't want to put off the solids for a while, you might try a different kind of food. Avocado is a good first food. Both my kids loved the stuff--my four year old still does, plain, straight-up. Anyway, it's mild and chock full of good stuff. I'm sure someone else has a link to good starter foods if it seems the rice and formula combo themselves are the problem.

Anyway, as promised, those are my thoughts. I have a problem with brevity, so I hope you could follow all that. Like I said, someone else with better info will be along soon! :) Blessings,
Lisa, mommy to
Isaac, 4 1/2
Hannah, 2
Ruth, expected 4/07

Lisa, Mommy to Isaac (6/02), Hannah (11/04), and Ruth Ann (4/07) Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2006
Tue, 01-02-2007 - 3:47pm

((HUGS)) sweetie. In case you didn't know, the boards have been down ALL day until just this second! Sorry if you've been waiting for a response.


I'm sorry that things aren't going well right now. Please accept my condolences on your aunt. My goodness...((HUGS))


I have found that a change in routine (i.e, the holidays are TERRIBLE!) can really mess things up. There were a few nights in a row that dd was up after 10, and then waking frequently during the night. Missed naps, not great naps, all of the the people, excitement, etc.


I would definitely take out the solids. You might find that it doesn't help, but at least you'll know that's NOT the culprit. And, even if she seems ready, her body might really not be (showing you in the sleep difficulties). I'm not quite sure what the problem is you're having right now...she won't go down well, or lots of waking? Maybe I missed that.


So, my advice is to try to get things back to normal schedule wise, nurse as much as possible, and take out all of the solids. Give it a few days, and we'll go from there. Keep us posted, and we'll go from there, okay?

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2006
Tue, 01-02-2007 - 5:39pm

Thanks Theresa, and I'm sorry I wasn't more clear about the difficulties. I feel I can hardly think straight these days.

She is totally fighting sleep- will stay awake as long as she possibly can, doing everything she can (looking around, grabbing my face & hair, refusing to lie back when she would normally let me rock her in a cradle type hold, crying...) I've worked hard to make sleep & going to sleep positive experiences for her. Up until now it's been a peaceful, quite, snuggly time- nursing or rocking and gently falling asleep. But she's been everything but snuggly lately. The last two days she's actually arched her back and gotten really upset when I've tried to either rock or cradle her. I can't identify anything else that seems wrong or might be bothering her.
She has also been waking up as soon as we put her down some of the time. And waking more frequently. This isn't constant though. She's had some good stretches of sleep at night here and there- 3 or 4 hours. She was wide awake at 11:30 new years eve after going to sleep at 8:30 or so. In between times though she woke up twice and was difficult to put down again. Even when she goes to sleep she is easily awakened. We are careful how we handle her, how we lie her down, I've followed all the tips I've read...

This may be unrelated but she used to have a poopie diaper every 3 days or so. When I got her completely off bottles/formula she went to every other day or every day. She's had 4 today!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker
Emma Easter
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2006
Tue, 01-02-2007 - 5:53pm

Thank you for your 2 cents Lisa. Yes my DD has had formula before- she was almost 100% formula fed at first due to a weak suck and too much weight loss. I have finally gotten her to exclusively bf the last couple of months. She hadn't had any problem with the formula other than not pooping much (and grunting for a full day before she'd pass anything).

So from what you and Theresa have written, it sounds like I need to either stop the solids or switch to a different type...?

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker
Emma Easter
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2006
Tue, 01-02-2007 - 5:55pm

Don't apologize, sweetie. ((HUGS))


Hmmm. But, you also just introduced the solids, right, so that could be contributing to the poop? I know you're not going to like hearing this, but I think you might be in the middle of a growth spurt or something developmental. And, it really sounds like it's only been a few days. You know what the answer to this is...this, too, shall pass. I know it's not the easy answer you want to hear, especially with all of the emotional stuff happening. I don't mean to belittle anything at all. I know how frustrating that can be.


Forgive me for not remembering...are you co-sleeping at all? Is DH helping out with the bedtime routine...have you switched it up at all? Have you ruled out teething?


My best advice is STILL to forgo any cereal. At least for a good 5 days or so. Again, if it DOESN'T improve, at least you've ruled it out as a culprit.


Hang in there!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2006
Tue, 01-02-2007 - 8:39pm

Theresa,
Yes I wondered about the solids contributing to the poops. They are pretty runny though...

"I think you might be in the middle of a growth spurt or something developmental." That reminds me... she is working on sitting- not sitting "up" on her own, but remaining in a seated position without anything supporting her. She's doing great at it. But I recall reading somewhere that sleep can be disrupted at times when they are working on certain developmental tasks...

We don't co-sleep although at night I sit propped up in our guest bed to nurse her and often fall asleep. Sometimes I wake up after a short time, sometimes it's a few hours. We nap like that sometimes during the day also. I can't nurse her lying down- she kicks her legs around and pushes up and it just gets really difficult. DH only helps with bedtime routine when I am not dealing with DD very well- when she just won't go to sleep after a long time or she keeps waking up. It's usually a last resort to bring him in because she usually only wants me.

IF this is just a thing that will pass I can deal with it. I've just felt like I've been missing something or I've been doing something wrong. My sisters says I just need to "ferberize" DD.

I'll see if stopping the cereal makes any difference.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker
Emma Easter
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-30-2003
Tue, 01-02-2007 - 8:46pm
I would second what Theresa said in her last post. I like her time table better: I'd give up the solids for at least those five days, giving it time to get out of her system and some time to see if she gets any better, sleepwise. As for what you start with, I was always anxious about rice cereal because the rice can cause constipation (I was hyper-sensitive because my two nieces both had years of constipation issues, from infancy to pre-school, so I was paranoid). I think I gave barley cereal a little later, but started with fruits and veggies. I don't know if you've seen it, but here's kellymom's page on first foods. Just a thought. http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/solids/first-foods.html Otherwise, like I said, I'd wait till you can get rid of some of the other variables to get a handle on what's causing the change--getting back to routine after the holidays, your getting yourself at least a little better emotionally, which she's sure to pick up on too--not a guilt trip, it's just the natural order of things. Which, when you consider the feel-good hormones you get from more nursing, it's probably a win-win anyway. So, yeah, I'd go with the nurse all she wants (still considering the growth-spurt possibility), stop the solids for a bit, and see what happens. Blessings. These are trying times you're going through. You have my prayers and sympathy. Lisa
Lisa, Mommy to Isaac (6/02), Hannah (11/04), and Ruth Ann (4/07) Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2006
Wed, 01-03-2007 - 11:44am

Sweetie, you're not doing ANYTHING wrong. With the developmental stuff she's going through right now, that's a very likely culprit. Here's the article you likely mentioned. It's more specific to 4

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2005
Wed, 01-03-2007 - 9:43pm

Hi -

I'm not sure if this is relevant or not - but my son just went through some major sleep issues and after 6 days of him fighting going to bed, not staying asleep once he was in his crib, and not napping well during the day - I called the pedi to see if it could be an ear issue - he just didn't want to be laying down or cradled. Went in just to check - was basically told they thought it was just a growth spurt which happens around 6 months - but the second ear they checked had lots of wax which the doctor took care of and then sure enough - ear infection.

He had no other symptoms - no fever, no ear tugging or rubbing . . just the sleeping issue and not wanting to lay on his back or on that side to nurse.

That's the only experience that I can share that might help.

I hope that you and your DD get some much needed rest too.

I know I enjoyed the holidays - but I'm also looking forward to getting back to as close of a routine as possible.

Hang in there.
-Sarah
Mom to Drew - 7/25/06

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2006
Wed, 01-03-2007 - 11:14pm

Thanks for all the links Theresa.
CIO just doesn't sit well with me. I don't want to teach my DD that I will only meet her needs when it's convenient for me. I do hope there is a more loving way to teach her to go to sleep on her own at some point though...

For now, I stopped the cereal and I'll wait and see how the next several days go. I noticed she has a little bit of a diaper rash too and that is the first time ever. Normally if I see any slight redness I put desitin on it and the next time I change her it is fine. I've put desitin on at every change today and though it is better it isn't gone after about 24 hours.

Last night was alright- she fell asleep in her carseat coming home from my Mom's. She woke up 2 1/2 hrs later, then about 3 hrs after that, then again at 3 hrs (which was 5:30am). At that time she was crying pretty hard, which she NEVER does at night. She was asking to nurse but just screamed and didn't even really try to latch on. Finally I gave her gas drops and forced her pacifier in while holding her tightly and bouncing. She finally calmed down. 1/2 hr or so later she nursed just fine.

She's been fussy today and has wanted to nurse a often but has also been fussy while nursing.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker
Emma Easter

Pages