Things No One Told Us About Having a Preemie

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Registered: 07-05-2005
Things No One Told Us About Having a Preemie
3
Wed, 11-07-2012 - 12:22pm
No one plans to deliver early. But nearly 1 in 8 women give birth prematurely (before 37 weeks), according to the March of Dimes. If you're one of them, you're likely having a birth experience that is nothing like the one you envisioned (you haven't even had your baby shower!) and you’re trying to do everything you can for your new baby, who may be in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU). Here's the emotional pep talk we wish we would've gotten during this emotional time.


Read More http://www.ivillage.com/having-premature-baby-advice-preemie-moms/6-b-422737#ixzz2BYgiGhe4
BTDT mamas- what do you wish you had known about having a preemie before you experienced it for the first time?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2012
Mon, 11-12-2012 - 3:29pm

I have realized in the last week that premie births are an entire different animals. I have recently added two grandsons to my family, and both were premie births. One weighed 3lbs 6 ozs and the other 2lbs 5 ozs. What amazes me most is how different the mothers are reacting to having these new babies. One is entirely devoted rarely leaving her son's side, and the other left the day after her son was born and decided to have a "me" day before returning to her son.

Though the one who is staying by her son's side is lucky enough to have a Ronald McDonald house nearby, but the other doesn't even know if there is one there, and she has had 2 weeks to figure this out. I would have slept in my car or found a place at a shelter just to be able to be near him.

I am still shaking my head over the differences in these two mothers.

MoCyn

Avatar for cmkristy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Tue, 11-13-2012 - 9:50am
Hi MoCyn, Congratulations on the birth of your two grandsons! It sounds like the two moms have very different ways of coping with the fact that their boys are in the NICU. Do you think perhaps that the one is just overwhelmed and not sure ho to deal with the stress of having a preemie in the NICU? Have you tried to talk to her about it? I'm sure it is very frustrating to see. :(

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2012
Fri, 11-16-2012 - 5:17pm

Hey Kristy,

There is no talking to that one mom. She is actually our god daughter, but calls us Mom n Dad and we have had her living with us off and on thru the years. She is 32 and has always live with/off others. Rarely holding a job down for long, and just got back from Korea after "couch surfing" at her sisters apt there. Her sister (another god daughter) has a Masters in education and teaches school there.

She will be living off her parents now for who knows how long. She said she is just overwhelmed, but she had 3 wks in the hospital before he was born - knowing he would be a premie - to make arrangements with the social worker there or other help to find a place nearby.

The fact that she left the day after he was born and stayed at her parents house for a "me" day just had me shaking my head. I would have stayed in my car (she doesn't have a car) or a shelter just to be near him. Or I would have napped in the waiting room at the hospital.

I just forsee that he will be raised/supported by her parents or other friends/family since she has no ambition or want to support herself. And though I know this might not be nice to say, it is a good thing she will not be able to have any more children.

The differences between this parent and our other (non birth) daughter is like night and day.