22 Month Old Not Sleeping Through the Night

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2012
22 Month Old Not Sleeping Through the Night
6
Sun, 03-04-2012 - 2:18pm

Hi everyone. Well, my husband and I are completely at our wits' end. We are beyond exhausted. DS wakes up at least 2 or 3 times each night on average. He will only fall asleep if someone is holding him/ rocking him.

We have a good bedtime routine, etc.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2011
Sun, 03-11-2012 - 1:26pm

Didn't mean to disappear.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2012
Mon, 03-05-2012 - 4:21pm

Wow, I hope you're okay from your car accident! Be careful out there. My husband got about one hour of sleep last night due to taking care of DS (we take turns every other night), and had to drive to work. I don't like that.

I wanted to share that I got this book called "Tears and Tantrums" by Aletha Solter, PhD. She studied with Piaget, etc., etc. I don't know why I haven't heard of her before I got this book today. Anyway, she has an interesting idea that sounds somewhat related to what your paents did with your sister. She says to never give a bottle or nurse or rock a baby to sleep. And never let them cry it out in the crib. She says what you should do is to hold them in their room (like sitting on a chair, but NOT rocking the chair -- or if it's an older child then you can sit in bed with them).

So with a baby (even a 2 year old), you hold them but do nothing else -- no rocking, no feeding, no singing. I think she says you can softly talk to them, but that's it. And you should expect that they'll cry, sometimes for over an hour -- for the first few times. But she says that this will get them to disassociate bottle feeding, breastfeeding, rocking, etc. to falling asleep, and at the same time you aren't abandoning them to their bed. Anyway, I'm going to try this and we'll see. Has anyone reading this tried this method?

I see what you're saying about rocking DS during his nap. I might ease into not doing that, but I'm going to keep doing it for now. I just want to make sure he's still tired at his regular bedtime when I try this new idea.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2011
Mon, 03-05-2012 - 12:56pm

My sister wasn't so much of a rocking to sleep as she was a walking to sleep kid.

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Registered: 03-04-2012
Sun, 03-04-2012 - 11:22pm

Akhtarsa, I just re-read your post. (See, I am sleep deprived so I'm a little slow!) DH is watching DS now.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2012
Sun, 03-04-2012 - 10:38pm

For naps, I hold him each day for two hours. I'm not sure I want to stop that because he gets fussy in the evening if he doesn't nap, and I don't mind holding him during the day. My son seems to only be happy if someone is actually holding him. If we're standing near his crib, I think it makes things worse than if we're out of the room because it's as though he's thinking: "Well, you're right there! Why don't you pick me up then?!!" (He doesn't actually talk yet, so we can't reason with him and let him know what the plan is.)

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2011
Sun, 03-04-2012 - 9:39pm

It is cruel to have a child crying to the point of vomiting when you can easily stop it.