How involved is your DH/SO with baby care?

Avatar for cmkristy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
How involved is your DH/SO with baby care?
5
Wed, 01-12-2011 - 11:03am

Figuring out all the new relationships and roles when a new baby arrives can be very challenging. Most new parents are surprised by what they learn about themselves and their partners when a baby comes.

Baby care: 7 ways to get dad involved- http://parenting.ivillage.com/pregnancy/pdads/0,,h​bng,00.html?ice=iv:mb:msg:kp

Does your partner actively help out with baby care? Does he change diapers or get up in the middle of the night? What doesn't he do that you wish he would?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2011
Wed, 01-12-2011 - 4:14pm
He doesn't get up in the middle of the night with him. when I was home from work he would say I needed to get up because he had to work in the morning and I didn't. Well when I went back to work, nothing changed. he's sleeping and I'm not.
Avatar for cmkristy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Thu, 01-13-2011 - 12:08pm
It sounds like you are in serious need of some rest! I'm sorry your DH isn't helping at night. My husband was the same way and I was up with all 3 of my kids every night. He did try to get up a few times but I was never able to sleep through it so I got up anyway!

Is there any way that you could sneak in a nap in the afternoon or early evening? The days when I was just totally exhausted I'd put him on baby duty and I'd rest in my room for a half hour or so. It really seemed to help!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2006
Fri, 01-14-2011 - 8:27am

My DH doesn't get up in the night, for several reasons: 1) He can't breastfeed, 2) I worry that if he loses sleep, he will fall asleep at the wheel during the day. DH has a long commute and I do worry that sleep deprivation could be dangerous for him. So I don't ask him to get up. Of course, sometimes he gets up anyway for his own reasons or because one of our other children is in need.

He also doesn't change diapers or do bathtime, but I suppose he could on weekends if he really wanted to.

This isn't to say that DH doesn't contribute anything to our family life. On weekends he does ALL the cooking because he likes to cook (and he doesn't think much of MY cooking!). This is his way of contributing to our family life, and it's fine by me!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2008
Fri, 01-14-2011 - 12:40pm

John is very hands on. He usually takes the 3 am feeding So I can have one long block of sleep. He goes to bed early, I do the last feeding at night and the first in the morning.

He "yells" at me if I get up and 3 and don't wake him up to go do it. He is convinced I will go nuts if I am home with them all day with no sleep:)

It cracks me up that his mom is so amazed that he gives them baths sometimes, tucks them in... etc.

She asked me when I was going to do the shopping and I just said I would go when he is home and she asked if he would be able to be home with them both together while I did that?

really?!

I can be home all day every day, but she thinks he is not able to handle an hour? silly silly

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Registered: 02-02-2004
Tue, 03-15-2011 - 11:04am

Since I've been Pregnant & since I've had our baby I have found