Worried about your princess??

Avatar for weberdns0
Community Leader
Registered: 08-25-2000
Worried about your princess??
10
Thu, 01-27-2011 - 5:26pm
Worried Cinderella Will Eat Your Daughter?

One mom did, and embarked on a personal campaign against girlie-girl culture



Read More http://www.ivillage.com/worried-cinderella-will-eat-your-daughter/6-a-317437#ixzz1CHFUliA6
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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2007
Thu, 01-27-2011 - 8:47pm
This was a great article!! I so agree about the princess affect. FSD10 has been showing it like crazy the last couple of weeks. Her bday was Monday and she's still in bday mode which means she's used to being spoiled right now. Craziness to me!!! There was only thing that is different for me. The author of the book said that parenting is current tense and that's it's hard to see the future. If you have another child that is older and the same sex. You can it pretty clearly. FSD10 has sometimes copied FSD18's bad behavior to a T and I've been working with DF to put a stop to that.
KRISTIE
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2002
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 6:27am

I find the article a bit mixed up.

To me a princess is girlie girl but also very innocent and childish and sweet.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-28-2005
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 7:43am

I think you're right, Moss. It's a phase a lot of girls go through. I appreciate that this mom taught her dd how to knit and make soap. But, how about doing some boy things too if


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2007
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 12:29pm
I see what you and Moss are saying. I just know for us, we have a girly girl that can become that image of a princess that isn't nice. Has to look just so and won't be hurried about it. DF has jumped on that right away. Part of this comes from kids just being spoiled. I was thinking that the author of the book wanted to tell us to be sure that we don't only let our girls focus on "princess" like things. To show them that there is a lot in our world and we have tons of choice about how we want to be.
KRISTIE
Avatar for weberdns0
Community Leader
Registered: 08-25-2000
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 1:18pm

Lizzie led a balanced life.....yes she loved the princesses.....and got to dance with one at the Parade at Disney World, and dressed up like one at Halloween, but she played soccer, and softball.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2002
Mon, 01-31-2011 - 5:54am
Yesterday we were talking in the car about one of DD's friends maybe having a small pamper party for her next birthday as her mum thought it was too much effort to invite lots of girls to go bowling as she did this year. DH asked what a pamper party was. I said makeup and hair and nails etc - and he immediately said "like a Princess" so he obviously links princess and make up together far more than I do!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2007
Mon, 01-31-2011 - 12:54pm
You know, I think I do this too. For me, the big issue seems to be that girls are allowed to do the "grown up" things much too early. What do they have to look forward to when they get older if they are allowed to do so much when they are so young. DD10 wants to wear high heals so much. She can't walk in them, they are bad for her health, and she's only 10. Maybe at 12 she can start wearing little heals, but not until then. Her big sisters helps her straighen (she was super curly hair) and now she wants it done too often and just the way she wants it. I told big sis that if she's not being apprciative then DD10 needs to start trying to do things on her own more! Big Sis agreed. So I worry for DD10 and the princess thing. I want her to be able to take care of herself some day and not depend on others too much.
KRISTIE
Avatar for weberdns0
Community Leader
Registered: 08-25-2000
Mon, 01-31-2011 - 1:24pm

That's true!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2002
Tue, 02-01-2011 - 12:12pm

I think we can project too much of our own stuff onto our dds. though. My dd was totally into princesses at three, but by four or five, that had shifted to fairies, and more for their magical and natural qualites (making plants grow, etc.) than anything in the beautification realm. Then again, when I read her princess stories, when she was tiny, I edited them. Instead of the prince and princess getting married, and living happily ever after, as is the old school way, they went to the prom, then went to college, graduated and got really good jobs. She would even finish that way, after a while. We also read her The Paper Bag Princess.

I'm in my mid 40's. I was born to a man who had wanted sons. I grew up resenting my girlness, because I knew, in the eyes of my father, I was second class. I want my daughter to embrace, and love her female side. One of the beauties of being a woman/girl is self decoration. We get to wear bright colors. We get to do braids, ponytails, buns, curls, etc. in our hair. We can wear pants, or skirts, lace or demin, and we should celebrate that. We need to teach them it can be celebrated without oversexualizing it.

But I also teach my daughter that it wans't that long ago women couldn't vote, that there were certain jobs we weren't allowed to do, that women like Amelia Aerhardt were unusual, because women weren't encouraged to do things like that, over even wear pants for that matter (not even when I was a little girl!)



iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2007
Tue, 02-01-2011 - 12:32pm
I love how you handled the pricess phase!! Very clever!!! and so appropriate. I'm jealous of all of you ladies that have had the privilage of raising your DD's from birth. DD10 is my future step daughter and I would have done things a little differently. But that is totally here say, so... Now I just work on what I see needs work and go from there! :-)
KRISTIE