~*~*Friday's Frustration*~*~

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-15-2003
~*~*Friday's Frustration*~*~
10
Thu, 05-05-2005 - 10:43pm

Hi Ladies :)


We all have good times and we all have bad times...Sometimes the bad times can get us to the point where we get so frustrated

Snowman Siggy

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2004
Thu, 05-05-2005 - 11:38pm
Dear Kathie, My finances
Avatar for heartsandroses2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 05-06-2005 - 9:49am

It's funny that this is today's topic, because this week has been an especially trying one for me. I've slowly been feeling less and less like getting out of bed in the morning and slowly I've developed an overall feeling of unhappiness with everything and everyone. California was great, but it wasn't relaxing and after we returned, I realized that we had gone $900 over budget for the trip, so now I am struggling to play catch up. One of my sisters asked me to join her on a long weekend for an Art's Show she's doing and I had to decline because of this oversight! My 17dd FINALLY had her prom and that was another HUGE expense (that I will not pay for next year in her SR year) and I also have some concerns about her BF being too insecure and slightly overbearing - not in an abusive way, just always needing to be with dd and worrying about when she goes away to college (it's 1.5 years away for crying out loud!), tells her he sees them to together forever and other stupid thigs that stress my dd out. She has only now just found her voice so I'm fairly comfortable knowing that she will stand her ground and not allow him to manipulate her - I have to keep an eye on it. My 15dd is still adjusting to her newest meds, but sadly, I have noticed that her tics have worsened and that concerns me...because she really needs the antidepressant meds but they are exacerbating her tics...I don't know what to do about that. Plus, she is just an overall worry for me - she's smoking cigarettes now and seems to make friends with all the bad kids, which I'm trying not to be judgemental about, but I can't help but be concerned for her as she's always had me on the edge of my seat. My H, who is handsome and funny and a hard worker, is basically becoming a eunich or something, as he is never in the mood when I am. We're out of synch and it's driving me nuts. He actually suggested that we take a mid week vaca, which sounds great but I can't trust my 15dd alone for any more than a few hours at a time and he doesn't seem to get that. It's frustrating to be sure. One of my other sisters owes me money still from the cancelled vaca and won't return my calls. My mother lives near this sister and my mother told me that she has no plans for Mother's DAy. I just wish my sister wasn't so screwed up. I wish I could be near my mom for Mother's Day so she could come to my house for the day and visit with us and have dinner with us. My sister harbors such anger and resentment towards the whole family and I can't understand that. I started myself on AD's this week because I felt like I was falling into a depression and all these frustrations were not helping. I also started an exercise regime and have stocked up on all my vitamins as well, so hopefully I will get back on track. I dread Fridays because as soon as I get home, my 15dd begins harrassing me about going out with her loser friends.

Whew - I feel better. I hope I didn't bore or exhaust anyway.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2004
Fri, 05-06-2005 - 12:02pm
Dear heartsandroses, Kids and bills and other issues tend to crop up. In a few years the kids will be grown and out. Your DD who is 15 is at an age where she can be a real pain and you will probaly be worrying over her for a few years. My youngest daughter was something else. The other 4 were not so bad. But this one did all kinds of things and the police would often visit plus she presented me with Elena, my 11 yr old granddaughter when she was 16. My husband and I had to take care of Elena while my dd finished school. When she was 18 she got her own place. She is 27 now and
Avatar for heartsandroses2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 05-06-2005 - 12:27pm

Thank MaryAnne, for your words of wisdom and kindness. I know that my dd will likely grow up one day and be okay...in the meantime, she presents so many challenges not only for herself but for those who genuinely love her. Most of the time, I do take things one day at a time and take deep breaths, go for a walk for time out, etc. But this week, I think there is some kind of cosmic takeover that is messing with me! I just can't seem to refocus fast enough, but I'm trying. The trouble with leaving dd with someone is that there really isn't anyone I can do that with. My one sister who lives nearby is much too busy and there isn't one friend of hers whose parents I would do that to! Hahaah - The best bet is to wait until school lets out and send her to her father's for a long weekend so H and I can run away for a day or so.

You sound like such a strong and loving woman - taking in and caring for your grand daughter is the epitome of love, IMO. I used to have a 16 y/o babysitter who no one would hire after she got pregnant. In fact one of my dd's friend's mother wouldn't let her dd over our house when this young mother was babysitting. I just think that's sad. She was and is a wonderful mother - now 23 and has another son, in fact, with the same father. They married a few years after thier dd's birth and they are doing well, against all odds.

My 15dd has tourettes syndrome (TS) and sometimes the meds for her depression and anxiety (mood disorder) intereferes with her TS and causes her tics to show themselves. The problem is she doesn't really want to take all those meds again and honestly, I don't like her taking them either - the one which is most effective is Risperdal and it's a tricky med. We're actually in the process of deciding our next step in the meds dept.

The money thing: I should be okay by end of June. I know it sounds like a long way off, but I will have to buy my girls some summer clothes soon, as they grow and grow...it's cray. I thought they'd be mostly done by now!

Anyway, thanks for your warm thoughts - it's nice to be reminded that I'm not the only one and that you survived!! Blessings to you and yours.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-1997
Sun, 05-08-2005 - 6:16pm

My thumb is my frustration. It just won't get better! I finally saw a doctor on Friday and after much pain (MUCH pain), and cleaning up of dead skin, she put me on antibiotics and told me to do pretty much what I've been doing for the past 2 weeks. But it is SO frustrating not to be able to USE the thing! Do you know how many things you do with your thumb? EVERYTHING!!!

Hopefully, once the antibiotics work it won't be as sore and I can manage to touch it to look at what's going on with it.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-15-2003
Fri, 05-13-2005 - 5:22am

My frustration is that I have too much on my plate.

Snowman Siggy

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-15-2003
Fri, 05-13-2005 - 5:28am

MaryAnne,


I guess I would come right out and say why you cannot make it to see him.

Snowman Siggy

Avatar for heartsandroses2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 05-13-2005 - 9:14am

{{{Kathie}}} - I hope you're able to find a few moments to have all to yourself this weekend.

Maybe a short walk in the woods where you can reconnect with nature and have some quiet thoughts to yourself; maybe a bath with some candles and a glass of wine; maybe lunch or coffee out with a friend (I try to meet my gf once a week in the morning before work for coffee - 30 minutes - just to catch up and it's great); maybe a nap.

Hugs~

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2004
Fri, 05-13-2005 - 9:48am
Dear Kathie, Thankyou for being so understanding. I know that when the time is right I will get to go. I received a lovely gift from my son and daughter-in-law, a yellow robe, so soft and
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-15-2003
Fri, 05-13-2005 - 4:55pm

Hearts, you didn't bore or exhaust me.

Snowman Siggy