Confession: Pregnancy & Parenting is Scary

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2007
Confession: Pregnancy & Parenting is Scary
10
Mon, 11-28-2011 - 1:41pm

I'm feeling overwhelmed with the negativity that can sometimes occur during pregnancy and the first year right now. Unfortunately, a friend of mine from high school just delivered her son still born at 33 weeks. I'm not sure on the details yet but I know that she was having very bad problems with insanely high blood pressure throughout the pregnancy. It's devestating news. Then my other friend has her 8 week old in the hospital right now with meningitis! How in the world does that even happen? It's awful. I think he is going to be alright, but I haven't heard updates.

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Avatar for chriscanuck
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2003
It is scary being a parent. Everything is out of your control and you have no idea what is going to happen.

My faith is one thing that helps me and also the knowledge that worrying about it isn't going to change it. If it is going to happen it is going to happen whether I worry about it beforehand or not. I would rather try to enjoy life and then deal with the negatives as they come up.

Right now we are waiting to find out if our baby has Trisomy 18 and I am scared and worried but I also know that I have no control over it so I am going to remain hopeful and positive until I am told otherwise.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2007
How long until you have results? Thinking of you.

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Registered: 06-06-2011

I'm the same way. I worried a lot with my son and during my pregnancy with him because people around me were having complications and sick children, so what if that happened to me during my pregnancy or to my son after he was born? Very early in his life (maybe by a month old or so), I learned that it is much less stressful to just take things as they come and realize that there are things beyond my control that may or may not happen. I'll cross that bridge if it comes my way and deal with it the best way I know how.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2006

You know, I've been much more anxious this time....I think with my DD I was just excited.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2005
This is where the internet makes things so much harder. Granted, these are close friends and you'd like hear anyway but having quick access to all kinds of stories could easily put us all over the edge.

For me, I really try not to think of any of those things, even when harsh things happen to others around me. I always try to keep a positive attitude, even when I feel down and out and crummy. It's not always easy. There are so many scary 'what if's' out there.

Try not to worry and enjoy!
sig2-sm

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2005
oh goodness Chris - how long do you have to wait? Did they suspect from a blood test or ultrasound or something? Thinking of you and staying positive along with you!!
sig2-sm

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-2008
When I was pregnant with DD, I said a little prayer every single day that basically said, "Please keep my baby safe and healthy. Please allow me to carry to term". I still find myself worrying over silly little things with her. About going places in the middle of nap time and how she'll act. I've learned to be more laid back and every time I worry, she proves to me why I shouldn't have wasted my time worrying.

I've been very laid back so far with this pregnancy. I've said that little prayer every once and awhile but nothing like before. I just keep telling myself that if something were wrong, I'd have some indication.

I'm a control freak and have major OCD. I think parenthood has really taught me to be more laid back. I still worry about the little things but then regret wasting my time worrying after the fact. Try to relax and just enjoy every moment. The world is a scary place sometimes and there are a lot of bad things that happen to good people. Try to keep your head up!
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Registered: 05-14-2003
Our initial ultrasound showed several markers (small head, multiple brain cysts and inability to get a clear heart picture) so on Thursday we are travelling to get a level II ultrasound. Depending on the results of that ultrasound they may recommend an amnio or further testing. We would probably do all testing on Thursday since we are travelling 5 hours to see the specialist. I am hoping we will have more direction on Thursday but I guess we will have to wait and see.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2004

I feel so safe with the

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Registered: 08-26-2010
Tue, 11-29-2011 - 10:52am

I will be thinking about you and your LO on Thursday. I hope everything will check out well.

I think for me I was most nervous/scared at the beginning of the pg since I m/c last time at 9 weeks. Now that I can feel the baby move around and have had a normal u/s I am feeling a lot more relaxed. I still have that little nagging thought every now and then that something could go wrong. However, I don't let it get to me for longer than those few moments.

Mostly I am just excited. I don't worry too much about financials or anything like that for the child. I know that there will always be a way to make things work. My dh has taught me that worrying does no good and it makes it hard to think with a clear mind! This baby is a blessing and I feel so much love for him already and can't wait to meet him. However, I also don't want this pg to end knowing its my last go around!

 


Karen