TTC after baby?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2007
TTC after baby?
12
Sat, 01-21-2012 - 5:00pm

Hi,

My name is Liz. My husband and I tried to conceive for 5 years with a miscarriage 5 yrs ago before we finally got pregnant. Now we are happily expecting our baby girl April 21st. We were both diagnosed with unexplained infertility. We were able to achieve this pregnancy by IUI on the first try in a blind study (meaning we don't know what drug was used but it was a pill not a shot). Luckily it was free as it would have taken us a awhile to

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-20-2012
In reply to: lmt65
Sat, 01-21-2012 - 5:11pm
Some ppl are lucky and become pregnant without drugs the second time. I know two ladies that this has happened to. However, I wouldn't not bf for this reason. I don't know of any clear research as to why women are more fertile after having one child through fertility. BFing can be a natural contraceptive if you are exclusively BFing. As time passes and the baby begins to eat solids and less BM it's not as reliable. I'm pg with #2 via Clomid. And let me tell ya...I was no where thinking of trying for another baby the first six months of his life. Not that I didn't want him to have a sibling, it was that I was so stressed during his few months that I knew I needed to wait.
BFing is sooooo much cheaper too.
My opinion is to just wait and see how you feel after the baby is a couple of months old. The first 3 months of BM are the most important to a baby. Also if you are having your period again you will be fertile.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2003
In reply to: lmt65
Sat, 01-21-2012 - 7:09pm
I agree with the previous poster. I wouldn't choose not to breastfeed just solely for the small possibility you might be more fertile right after the birth. Some people are more fertile and other people still have the exact same fertility problems that they had before. Some people even have a harder time getting pregnant with their second than they did with their first. I think it is too much of an unknown factor to choose not to breastfeed just for that reason alone. Even while breastfeeding your fertility may return. I personally start getting my period again within a few months of birth even though I exclusively breastfeed.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2011
In reply to: lmt65
Sat, 01-21-2012 - 11:16pm
This is just my opinion and whatever you decide is totally up to you. As long as a baby is fed i am good with that ;) but personally i would not give up on bf...if she does happen to be your only child you will miss a WONDERFUL experience. I have had 5 children in my 30s...I am now 40. Granted I have never had fertility issues but I still think your window will be around for awhile. And I doubt you will want to be pg the first few months anyway. :) I know MANY ladies that nursing does not work as a natural contraceptive and you maybe one. Good luck on your decision.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2007
In reply to: lmt65
Sat, 01-21-2012 - 11:19pm
This is a tricky question. I have also heard that some people are more fertile after having a baby, but I wouldn't hedge on it. What would concern me more than anything if I were you is your age associated with the problems you've had getting pregnant. Those are the greater factors I would weigh. The only reason I word it like that is because my dearest friend is also going through similar unexplained infertility treatment and I know every doctor has mentioned the success rates for infertility treatments drop off sharply at 35. If you are absolutely positive you would like to try for another I wouldn't fault you for wanting to not breastfeed. It is like all things and effects women differently. For me, the whole time I was BFing I was infertile. It was absolutely a natural contraceptive to me for the entirety of 9 months until I stopped--even though we were doing solids as well. I wouldn't not breastfeed because you think you might get pregnant in a more fertile time period after baby gets here because that is debatable. However! Given your age and previous issues I think those bear some serious thought on what your decision might be. It's up to you! No one will look at you any better or worse for what you do. I've BF one and FF one and I will be the first to tell it is all different depending on your child. There are benefits to BFing (such as the child not getting sick as much, etc) that aren't necessarily true for each child.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2007
In reply to: lmt65
Sat, 01-21-2012 - 11:47pm

Thank you all for your advice especially regarding such a senstive topic. It is very helpful to hear about other people's experiences. I also would like to thank you all for not being judgemental. I 've googled message boards regarding such personal decisions and

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2007
In reply to: lmt65
Sun, 01-22-2012 - 12:02am

What a difficult decision! I haven't heard about a bump in fertility immediately following birth, but I have heard about a lot of women who are much more fertile after they finish breastfeeding.

I didn't get my period until DD was 13 months old. Then I only had one and was *BAM* pregnant again. With our first we tried for about 6 months (with charting, temps and trying to do everything the right way.) Because it wasn't super easy the first time around we weren't thinking about contraception. I felt a definite boost in my fertility when DD started sleeping through the night (12 months, then got my period) and I had another boost when she was down to 1 BF a day.

I think it would be a good idea to start off BFing and see how you go. I think docs recommend waiting 6 weeks before having sex anyway, and even if you only BF another 6 weeks after that, it would make a huge difference in getting your baby off on the right start and give you that wonderful bonding experience.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2008
In reply to: lmt65
Sun, 01-22-2012 - 4:56pm

Here is two stories that might help you decided. I have a friend that got pregnant with her first child after trying for about a year. It took her 5 years to get pregnant with her 2 even though she started trying right away. She got pregnant with her 3 about 3 months after her 2 and her 4 and about 3 months after her 4 and her 5 about 3 about 3 months after her 4. She has stop trying to get pregnant And started trying to spread them out around her 3 child. She now has like 11 kids. ( I know a lot of large famlies) She is in her late 40's right now and her youngest is 5 months. I don't think she got to BF though because of health issues. so you really never know. Now for my story. It took me a year to the day to get pregnant with my first. I was going to call and look for a fertility specailest in 2 months ( we where in the middle of moving and needed to find a dr first.) Anyways I lost him so I never got to Bf him. I was expecting it to take another year to get pregnant again so we kind of half tried right away. Well 3 months latter I was pregnant with Noelle. She was born and I Bf her. I got my period back right away. and 5 months latter I was pregnant again with my miscarrage. 4 months latter I was pregnant with Marcel. I was still nursing Noelle. I was nursing both and got my period back right away again and it was a little over a year before I got pregnant with this one.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-30-2003
In reply to: lmt65
Mon, 01-23-2012 - 2:01pm

You've already gotten some great responses but I did want to chime in since this issue directly happened to me.

Sarah

Lily Jane 4/6/05

Stella Mae 11/29/06

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2011
In reply to: lmt65
Mon, 01-23-2012 - 4:04pm
My story. Both DH & I are only children and HATED it. So we knew we wanted more than one child. It took 2 years to get our son and we decided to NOT use any form of BC after he was born. He was born 7wks early and spent 3.5 wks in the NICU and I was pumping but couldn't hardly get any milk, so it was like a formula fed with breast supplements. When he was 2 months old, I was hospitalized for a week and the meds they gave me, dried what milk I did have. He went on to be formula fed and was and still is healthy! When he was 4 months old, I found out I was pregnant again! Suprise! We call her the suprise wanted oops - we wanted her but not so quick. Those 2 are 11.5 months apart, was supposed to be 12.5 but she was early as well.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-2008
In reply to: lmt65
Fri, 01-27-2012 - 12:11am
I totally understand your desire to have your kids closely spaced but it sounds like you want to breastfeed. What happens you start trying immediately and don't breastfeed and then don't get pg right away like you want? Won't you feel sad that you gave up breastfeeding? I'm not saying that you can't formula feed, that's a personal choice but I wouldn't give it up just because you want to get pg.

Your baby will only be a baby once and once you decide not to breastfeed it's not like you can go back. I would enjoy your baby for the time you have her as a baby and everything will work out naturally. I too wanted another baby, but was able to breastfeed for 17 mos and my daughters will only be 27 months. It took me a long to get pg w/ my first (a year) and luckily I got pg quickly w/ # 2. Things just worked out the way they were supposed to and I'm glad I did not sacrifice that special time when I breastfed my daughter.
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