Anyone else not have a good relationship with your ILs?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2008
Anyone else not have a good relationship with your ILs?
4
Thu, 02-02-2012 - 6:26pm

My husband and I don't have a relationship at all with my in-laws.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2008

Me too! The relationship with my il's is ROUGH!! We actually aren't speaking to them right now. My mil was super rude when she found out we were pregnant and I really can't figure out why. It's not like we ask her to do anything for us or our kids. In fact, she relies on us a heck of a lot more... if anything. The big problem stems from the fact that DH voluntarily rendered custody of his girls (he has been the primary custodial for the last 5 years) back to their mother this past summer. They are madder than heck because they just don't understand the concept of equal parenting time. We thought it should be her turn for awhile, the kids missed her, she has pulled her life together (somewhat)... the list goes on. Any who, the relationship is strained and it doesn't look like it will be getting better, ever. I understand how you feel. It sucks not getting along because the kids need the relationships and it's nice to be close to family. Unfortunately, there is not a book of easy answers for these super complex situations! All we can do is our best with what we have.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2008
Thanks y'all! Yes, he has a very good reason and I fully support him in it. It won't change because of the baby- this I know, and really agree with! It's just sad. But I am determined that baby will not be lacking in the love department!!! :) Thank you for your kind replies!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2006

Right now our relationship with the ILs is fine, but we've gone through periods when there was no contact.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2012
i dont really have a bad or good relationship w my il. hubbys mom is passed, i never even met her, and him and his dad have an on n off relationship. i think things would be diff if his mom was still here (just from what i hear from dh anyways). it doesnt really bother me. idk how that makes me sound, but its the truth.

would it be hurtful to your dh if you wanted to strike up a relationship w your il? i ask cuz if not maybe you can call em up or meet for lunch or something and spill the beans about the l.o. coming....but i hv no idea what the back story is w you guys. things may be diff once the baby comes, either concerning your dh or them. babies can do great things for families...you never know. (((HUGS)))
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