Neighbor asked me if I am pregnant

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2005
Neighbor asked me if I am pregnant
16
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 11:03am

So a neighbor asked me if I was pregnant yesterday.  I told her yes and asked "what gave it away?" and she just said that I looked pregnant!  For some reason, even though I am pregnant, being only 11 weeks, I still felt slightly offended.  I know my belly is definitely larger than normal, but I have been wearing pretty lose clothing and I didn't think it was that obvious.  This is definitely a new record for me as far as someone asking if I was pregnant based solely on how I look!

On the other hand, she is lucky I am actually pregnant!  Talk about uncomfortable if I wasn't!

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2007
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 11:16am

Wow, that was pretty gutsy of her.. Usually the rule of thumb is NEVER ask a woman if she's pregnant unless she mentions something or it's blatantly obvious. Even then you could end up offending someone.  

I was reading on another board somewhere that a woman was at a tea shop and noticed that the woman behind the counter was pregnant, got all excited and said "Oh, you're pregnant too!"  The woman told her that she had actually lost the baby a week before but had to work while she waited to pass the baby. They were both so upset that they started crying and the woman left so embarrassed.  After hearing that, I decided never to ask unless they're wearing a t-shirt that says "Baby on Board" or something.

On a side note, maybe you were just glowing :smileyhappy:

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 11:18am
You have to wonder why people think it is ok to ask these questions. Don't they know the you never ask a woman if she is pregnant rule? You always let them bring it up first!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 11:19am
Oh that would be just horrible! So sad!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2005
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 11:31am
Holy crap that would be soo embarrassing! I would never even think to ask a woman about her pregnancy because personally I hate small talk. I'd rather just observe and keep it moving.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2005
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 11:57am

Oh trust me, I am not glowing unless sun reflecting off an oily, teenage acne style face counts ;-)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2005
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 12:00pm

I did briefly considering saying "No" just to see the look on her face ha ha ha but I was nice and didn't say anything.

Yeah, I thought it was gutsy too - she said she actually thought I looked pregnant on 4th of July!  I was like 7 weeks then!  Ouch!

That's such a sad story about the woman at the coffee shop - sad all the way around - sad that she had to work and go out in public while going through somethng so painful!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2009
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 3:26pm

I had this happen twice today!  The first lady asked me if I had gained some weight, but she was smiling, so...I knew what she was asking.  The second lady said I love your baby bump!  I have not embraced my own baby bump yet and people are calling me out.  I am only 10 weeks, but this is my 3rd pregnancy and I think my stomach just doesn't hold up like it use to. =)  I wish I could be more excited when they comment, but it is not comfortable. I haven't found a good response yet.  I just smile and say, yes we are expecting.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2007
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 5:42pm

Oh gosh I definitely look pregnant and have for a couple of weeks (I am 13+ weeks pregnant).  However nobody has asked thank goodness.  I am self conscious about looking so pregnant so early!  Last time I didn't show nearly this soon!

And if I want to ask if someone is pregnant I just ask how many kids they have or if they have kids.  If they are pregnant they usually bring it up.  I'd hate to offend anyone!

Collyn 9 mo siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2010
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 8:55pm

I actually had someone ask me BEFORE I even knew I was pregnant!  It was at my son's 1st bday party & for comfort I just had on a loose fitting skirt & top, but I sure as hell did NOT look pregnant!!  She's an older cousin (in her early 80s) of my bf and really lacks any type of internal filter these days.  When I got this totally shocked & really offended look on my face & almost shouted "no, I am not!" that didn't even stop her mouth from running.  She went on to say that she thought I might be because I had on a "hatching jacket"! LOL!  I was so offended & amazed at the nerve of this woman that I just got up, mouth hanging open & walked away.  I then burst into tears when my mom asked me what had happened (guess those hormones were already raging, I just didn't know it).  We haven't told her that I am indeed pregnant because neither of us want to deal with her saying she "knew".  This is also the same woman that came into my hospital room after I had my son and asked me to please stop breast feeding until after her visit because it wasn't appropriate, and that my newborn son was cute, but nothing like "those twins" (my bf's brother & sil had twins 8 yrs ago)!!  Not exactly one of my favorite people in his family to say the very least!!

Anyway, my point is that I know how uncomfortable that is and I am always blown away by people that are ballsy enough to ask a woman if she's pregnant at any point in time!

Lilypie Maternity tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2006
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 11:49pm

I had someone ask me at a huge family party before we had told everyone. I told her know and it was kind of fun to watch her squirm and backtrack. Seriously WHAT are people thinking?

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