Neighbor asked me if I am pregnant

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2005
Neighbor asked me if I am pregnant
16
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 11:03am

So a neighbor asked me if I was pregnant yesterday.  I told her yes and asked "what gave it away?" and she just said that I looked pregnant!  For some reason, even though I am pregnant, being only 11 weeks, I still felt slightly offended.  I know my belly is definitely larger than normal, but I have been wearing pretty lose clothing and I didn't think it was that obvious.  This is definitely a new record for me as far as someone asking if I was pregnant based solely on how I look!

On the other hand, she is lucky I am actually pregnant!  Talk about uncomfortable if I wasn't!

 

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Avatar for duchessdina
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2011
Tue, 08-07-2012 - 10:39pm
So I guess I have more to add to this....yesterday at work a patient's mother called me out on being pg. She asked me if I was the nurse from MN and I said no, so she said...Oh it must be the other pg nurse! I said excuse me, and she said you're pg right? I hadn't told any of my coworkers except for my supervisors who would never tell a soul. Plus I'm NOT showing and it's our first so I just look my normal self which is a size 12, but my stomach is still pretty darn flat and scrubs hides pretty much everything! She said she just knew somehow! I think she needs to play the lottery because it was crazy weird!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2010
Tue, 08-07-2012 - 11:57am

I have had two separate people in the last month ask me if I was pregnant. One was a woman from my building who asked me, "When are you due". I said, "I'm not. I have a large ovarian cysts and I am unable to more children." (I have a 14 year old son). It stopped her in her tracks and she apologized profusely. I think she learned her lesson. NEVER assume someone is pregnant unless they tell you or they are in the process of giving birth. To be fair I do look about 4 months pregnant.

And another thing, if one more person asks me when I'm going to have more kids I'm going to scream. Just because you think I'm young doesn't mean I am able to have more children. People never realize the pain they cause by asking a simple question.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007
Tue, 08-07-2012 - 10:58am

I've yet to be called out this time, though when my parents arrive for a visit this weekend, I expect that my mom will notice that I already have a bit of a bump showing (at 4'11", I was showing at about 15 weeks with LittleDude, and I'm starting to show now even though I'm only 12 weeks as of tomorrow). 

However, all of this reminds of me being called out after LittleDude was born. I was asked three times after he was born at (barely) 34 weeks if I was in labor/ready to pop in the first week of his life. 




iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2011
Mon, 08-06-2012 - 7:04pm
I had giant babies and my tummy never was the same again after either boy. After my second especially my stretched out tummy did still look slightly pregnant. I got questions about it all the time. Fortunately, I'm not too worried about things like that and just had a good laugh each time it happened.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2007
Mon, 08-06-2012 - 3:18pm

I've also learned not to ask, its embarrassing for everyone involved if she's not. I was asked at 10 weeks with my 2nd.A lady at work started rubbing my belly saying how cute my baby bump was...I was mortified.  My SIL asked me this past weekend very discreetly.  She said I just had the look about me.  I too only feel a little chubbier with a small bump,but mostly just thicker around the waist.  I"m getting a tad bid nervous of telling,and was a little annoyed that she asked. (we are waiting till the OB appt on the 17th to spill the beans. I will be just 14 weeks)

r

Avatar for duchessdina
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2011
Sat, 08-04-2012 - 12:39pm
I've also learned never to ask. Sometimes women just put on a little weight and I don't want to be the one to point it out! No one knows yet since this is our first and I have no bump, I just feel like I'm pudgy. I was at the farmer's market today and there were tons of cute baby bumps and I was a little jealous. I know soon enough I'll have a huge baby bump and think otherwise. It was pretty hot out, I felt bad for some of them.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2006
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 11:49pm

I had someone ask me at a huge family party before we had told everyone. I told her know and it was kind of fun to watch her squirm and backtrack. Seriously WHAT are people thinking?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2010
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 8:55pm

I actually had someone ask me BEFORE I even knew I was pregnant!  It was at my son's 1st bday party & for comfort I just had on a loose fitting skirt & top, but I sure as hell did NOT look pregnant!!  She's an older cousin (in her early 80s) of my bf and really lacks any type of internal filter these days.  When I got this totally shocked & really offended look on my face & almost shouted "no, I am not!" that didn't even stop her mouth from running.  She went on to say that she thought I might be because I had on a "hatching jacket"! LOL!  I was so offended & amazed at the nerve of this woman that I just got up, mouth hanging open & walked away.  I then burst into tears when my mom asked me what had happened (guess those hormones were already raging, I just didn't know it).  We haven't told her that I am indeed pregnant because neither of us want to deal with her saying she "knew".  This is also the same woman that came into my hospital room after I had my son and asked me to please stop breast feeding until after her visit because it wasn't appropriate, and that my newborn son was cute, but nothing like "those twins" (my bf's brother & sil had twins 8 yrs ago)!!  Not exactly one of my favorite people in his family to say the very least!!

Anyway, my point is that I know how uncomfortable that is and I am always blown away by people that are ballsy enough to ask a woman if she's pregnant at any point in time!

Lilypie Maternity tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2007
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 5:42pm

Oh gosh I definitely look pregnant and have for a couple of weeks (I am 13+ weeks pregnant).  However nobody has asked thank goodness.  I am self conscious about looking so pregnant so early!  Last time I didn't show nearly this soon!

And if I want to ask if someone is pregnant I just ask how many kids they have or if they have kids.  If they are pregnant they usually bring it up.  I'd hate to offend anyone!

Collyn 9 mo siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2009
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 3:26pm

I had this happen twice today!  The first lady asked me if I had gained some weight, but she was smiling, so...I knew what she was asking.  The second lady said I love your baby bump!  I have not embraced my own baby bump yet and people are calling me out.  I am only 10 weeks, but this is my 3rd pregnancy and I think my stomach just doesn't hold up like it use to. =)  I wish I could be more excited when they comment, but it is not comfortable. I haven't found a good response yet.  I just smile and say, yes we are expecting.

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