I lost my baby

Avatar for allysonz
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
I lost my baby
33
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 9:20am
I just wanted to let you know that we lost our baby on April 16th.

I was having lots of cramping on April 15th, and had bright red blood - my DH rushed me to L&D where they said I was 10 centimeters and my bag was about to burst. Baby was ok, his HB was 170 and he was kicking up a storm. They rushed me into emergency C-section where he was born on April 15 and lived 34 hours. He was doing fine for the first 30 hours, he was trying to breathe on his own and everything, but then he got blood in his lungs and he couldn't fight it.

I have been in a state of shock this whole week, I had no idea that this would happen to me, I had no problems through out my pregnancy and the baby was healthy. I have what is called an incompetant cervix. My cervix will start to dialate without me feeling anything, then my body will realize this is happening and I will start having contractions and go into labor. By the time this happened to me, it was too late to stop it. My OB says next time I get PG I will have a stitch put in my cervix to prevent it from dialating, and I will never have a vaginal birth, which really upset me, but at this point I will be thankful to even have another child.

My DH and I are absolutely heartbroken, I was 24 weeks and couldn't have imagined this would have happened. The only thing getting us through is knowing there is always another chance, but I miss being pregnant so much...I miss feeling him kick and I miss the beautiful feeling I felt.

I wish you all the happiness and hope you are all blessed with healthy miracles from God.

Allyson EDD 8/5 Anthony Joseph born April 15 passed April 16

Avatar for brooklyn70
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: allysonz
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 10:28am
Allyson, I am so very sorry. I remember you from the tcyfc message board. I know I can't say anything to ease your pain right now, but know that you and DH are in my thoughts and in my prayers.

-Brook

Avatar for cl_kmcoch
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: allysonz
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 10:33am
Allyson, I'm so, so sorry for your loss. I don't know what to say other than I will be praying for your family and you are certainly welcome to stay here with us. We will support you all that we can. Please take time to grieve and to heal. Kristie
Avatar for isabel669
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: allysonz
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 10:34am
I am so sorry Allyson. I remember you from the TTCFC board.

There are not words to say how sorry it is to hear your news. I will keep you in my prayers.

Isabel, 33 http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1247b TTC 8+ yrs Diagnosed with PCOS 7/03 9 cylces of Clomid 9 cycles Femara cd2-cd6 1st IUI/Femara/Trigger shot - 6/6/04 - BFN
Avatar for meliaf19
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: allysonz
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 10:50am
Oh, Allyson. I am so sorry. I know there are no words that can help with the pain so just know I am keeping you, your DH and Anthony in my prayers.

Hugs,

Melia

Avatar for hschebel
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: allysonz
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 10:57am
Oh Allyson. I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful baby boy. How heartbreaking for you and your DH. I can't imagine the profound joy and incredible sadness those short 34 hours must have held for you. I'm sorry that this happened to you, your DH and your sweet baby Anthony. I wish I could do something to make any of it better. I'll have to settle for hoping and praying that you and DH find a way to make it through this and that you have family and friends that you can lean heavily on right now. It is hard to find anything good in all of this, but I am thankful that you could kiss his sweet little cheek and name him.

Huge, enourmous, tear-soaked hugs for you.

-Heather


Edited 4/24/2003 10:59:26 AM ET by hschebel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: allysonz
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 11:19am
oh my god alyson i have tears streaking down my face. i wish you and DH all the strength and positive thoughts and vibes i can muster. i can't imagine how much that hurts ((((hugs)))) get pregnant as soon as you can. wish there was something i could do....

xoxoxo ella

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
In reply to: allysonz
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 11:37am
Allyson,

I am so terribly sorry for your loss. I remember you from the ttcyfc board. I know no words can ease your pain, but I hope that you and DH are surrounded by people who care about you and can support you during this time of sadness.

My thoughts are with you,

Michele

Avatar for rinnaccino
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: allysonz
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 12:21pm
Allyson,

I am SOOO sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what you are going through. Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your husband. ~Erin

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: allysonz
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 1:06pm
Allyson, I am so sorry for your loss. You, DH and Anthony are in my prayers.

((hugs))

Samantha

Avatar for leighlandin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: allysonz
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 2:09pm
Oh (((((Allyson))))), I am so unbelievably sorry for your loss. I am heartbroken for you and your DH. You both are in my prayers, as is your beautiful Anthony Joseph. Wishing you strength and peace as you grieve and heal, and another precious miracle when the time is right.

Leigh