Gender Disappointment?

Avatar for cmkristy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Gender Disappointment?
Tue, 01-29-2013 - 1:16pm

Some women feel a momentary twinge of sadness when they find out the gender of their baby. For others, the disappointment cuts deeper, and can even turn into depression. This phenomenon, known as “gender disappointment,” is rarely discussed yet common among expectant mothers. 

“We assume gender disappointment is quite a hidden experience, yet extremely common especially in certain cultures” says Dr. Louann Brizendine, a neuropsychiatrist at UCSF and author of The Male Brain and The Female Brain.  “As many as 1 in 5 women express at least some disappointment about the sex of the child they are carrying.”

Gender disappointment: Expectant mothers confess secret regrets-

Can you relate to this feeling?  Anyone here dealing with a bit of disappointment after finding out baby's sex?

 photo snowsiggy.png

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2013
Thu, 01-31-2013 - 1:10pm

This is why I've decided to stay on the green team this time around. I hate to say it, but I really want a girl.  I don't want to get my hopes up and I know the second I see him or her, I'll be in love no matter what. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2010
Thu, 01-31-2013 - 10:46pm

this is sad, but really really understandable. i think i definitely would have had at *least* a twinge of disappointment if my first were a boy - I wanted a girl SO badly. This time around, since I have my girl, it really doesn't matter to me either way. I know my husband would like a boy (but would also be so happy with another little girl, he is so in love with dd) so any disappointment I felt would be on his behalf if this one is a girl too.

Avatar for neutle
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-1999
Wed, 02-27-2013 - 4:42pm

With my DS, I had been absolutely convinced he was a girl ~ up until they told us "and there's the boy part". LOL

This time around, at first, I was really hoping for a girl. Then I got to thinking how much fun I've had with my sweet son (he's sweet even as a teenager LOL), and was then kind of hoping for a boy. In reality, I wanted twins ~ one of each ~ but we're having just one ~ a girl. I just had a moment of "Really? :S" and then I was fine. (My cousin (due 5 days before me) is having twins, though ~ but she's having identical girls. Excited for her, but glad it's not me with the identical girls. LOL)

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2014
Sat, 07-19-2014 - 7:32am

Yes, I have twice!  I've been looking for ways to make sure my next is a girl.  Any ideas anyone?