Scared to death of what's to come

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2011
Scared to death of what's to come
16
Mon, 11-14-2011 - 7:03pm

Regardless if my birth is vaginal or section, I am super scared. My anxiety is through the roof right now, I guess because that day just keeps coming closer and closer. It's like standing in line for a ride on a roller coaster, you know in the end it's fun, but in the meantime you're scared to death of it!

I have never been admitted to a hospital. I do not have a fear of hospitals, I've been exposed to them all my life, but in a different light. I went to visit, pick up mom's check from work, visit mom at work, see my pediatrician (once before he moved out of the hospital and into his own office), and now recently to see my OBGYN. Going to the lab for them to take my blood was perhaps the worst thing I have ever encountered so far besides getting my shots (1. I hate needles 2. I like my blood in my body thankyou!)

Then came my doctor's predictions that I will more than likely be a C/S if my baby is over 5 lbs, just because I'm so small and I'll more than likely get serious tears or injure myself or the baby because my pelvic bones will not stretch enough (doctor did NOT tell me this to scare me away from a natural birth. I'm on Team Get the baby out!) So now I deal with surgery.

I do not think any amount of drugs will prepare me for either delivery method. I literally pale at the thought of beign sliced open, stitches, needles, and (UGH) catheters. (Nothing against natural home births, but I just don't feel safe doing one, so it's not even close to being an option)

Anyone else share hospital anxiety? I think I just need to hear less horror stories revolving around births, maybe that's ease my nerves? I was alright after giving my blood samples, I could probably do it again with less anxiety, hopefully once I get through this experience, I'll man up and finally fly on an airplane LOL

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2010
Mon, 11-14-2011 - 7:53pm

Last year I had my first surgery since I was a toddler. I was frightened! I knew I would be asleep and not feel the surgery, but it still was bothersome. One thing that I was really worried about was placing an IV. I thought it would really hurt. Turned out to be the same as getting your blood drawn, so if you did ok with that you should be ok for an IV. The nurse did offer me some numbing medicine, which I declined and didn't need. From what I've heard with a c/s they'll numb you up so that you might feel some pressure but not pain or being cut/stitched. The catheter isn't all that bad. The worst thing about it is that you feel like you have to go to the bathroom.

HTH.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2011
Mon, 11-14-2011 - 7:59pm
(((((ASHLEY))))))! It is totally normal to be nervous of the unknown and its compounded by your fears. BLOCK OUT THE BAD STORIES!!!!!!!! Don't listed to other people's experiences unless you trust them completely. Stranger's experiences do not apply to you and their stories are not helpful (in my honest opinion). I have never been in the hospital for anything other than my kids birth and one night due to an infection after delivering my first. I too grew up around hospitals and spent lots of time there with my dad. You've never been the patient and that is a different experience. Talk to and trust your doctor. Your nurse can be your best friend. Trust her/him. I'm doing this for the third time and promise it is worth the poking, prodding and general lack of control.

Mostly, I send you a big hug.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2009
Mon, 11-14-2011 - 9:55pm
I had a lot of fears with my first one. What helped me was going to the Labor and Delivery area of the hospital. I meet the nurses, they went through the general stuff with me. And when it came down to it, it wasn't that bad. I am used to needles so getting an I.V. wasn't that bad and when you are in labor getting poked with a needle is a very small amount of pain. If you do think maybe you will go natural there are things to do before hand that helps with tearing. And the doctor can also help so you don't tear as much. But I do have to say, nothing anyone could say could help completely calm my nerves, you just have to prepare yourself and experience it for yourself. Most labor and delivery stories are good, it's just that we remember the bad ones.

Natasha
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2011
Mon, 11-14-2011 - 10:00pm

Thanks :)

No doubt when this baby is out, I'll finally be normal, I would skydive for him. I know those stories never mean it's what I'll go through, but I think it's mostly I'm afraid the drugs won't work, like I'll feel everything.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2011
Mon, 11-14-2011 - 10:03pm

My mom has been an OB nurse for 30 years, all my life I was around the nurses, they make everything look so easy, bless them :) It makes me feel better that I know my doctor and nurses are people that have known me since my birth (which is kind of weird in a way) and are extremely professional.

The people I saw in my birth day video are the same ones that will be in there to catch little NB :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2009
Mon, 11-14-2011 - 10:07pm
They can put something over your hand so you can't see the IV. That way you don't have to look at it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2011
Mon, 11-14-2011 - 10:35pm

HAHA, I just got the funniest mental image of me with that big cardboard glove they make over my hand. They use it on children and older people that will try and pull the IV out. Two pieces of cardboard are on either side of the hand and they just tape it. It always looked funny to me :P They might just have to do that though, I like the idea of me not seeing it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2007
Tue, 11-15-2011 - 7:09am
I was like you i had never been admitted to the hospital b4 having kids, i had had some minor in office procedures and stuff but that was it. It's totally normal to feel the way you do. I remember having an epiphany one day and thinking OMG a baby is going to come out of me, ahhhh! Most hospitals offer tours and you may get a chance to talk to the nurses there, also most offer 4 to 6 week birthing classes and they will tell you most of what to expect. I have had 2 sections and if you want i can give you a run down of what to expect before, during and after a c-section. Let me know.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2008
Tue, 11-15-2011 - 7:49am

You've gotten lots of great advice already, but i can totally understand the anxiety related to hospitals as I am the exact same way. I hate it... i've only had a few medical procedures done and needless to say when it came time to an induction with DS i was nervous as anything!

Best advice is to block out negative or bad vibes and stories... try and focus on positive things and read about positive birth stories! There are lots of people who post really great birth stories online, both c-section and vaginal. Have you thought about watching a movie like the buisness of being born? Its really good to watch to see how birth occurs and while it does focus a lot on the differance between hospital and home birth it really gives you a good idea of what birth is like and can be like and its not negative, its all very positive!

have you thought about looking into some relaxation techniques such as hypnobirthing? You don't have to take a class, you can order DVDs or CDs online and do it that way.

Try not to think about the scary parts... while a c-section recovery is difficult for some, others have great experiences. I ahve a friend who had a planned c-section and was doing gentle slow jogging at home at 2 weeks post partum!

And, as my coworker always says, labor is only a day of your life ... while it'll be painful its not forever and at the end you ge your beautiful baby... and it can't be that bad because some women do it 20 times1 ;)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2008
Tue, 11-15-2011 - 7:52am

Oh DS had an IV when he was born and they taped it up like that! You could get a large mitten to stick over it too... and by the way an IV is just a thin cathodor tube left in thats why you can't feel it =) Honestly the first time I had an IV it freaked me out too!

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