Scared to death of what's to come
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|Mon, 11-14-2011 - 7:03pm|
Regardless if my birth is vaginal or section, I am super scared. My anxiety is through the roof right now, I guess because that day just keeps coming closer and closer. It's like standing in line for a ride on a roller coaster, you know in the end it's fun, but in the meantime you're scared to death of it!
I have never been admitted to a hospital. I do not have a fear of hospitals, I've been exposed to them all my life, but in a different light. I went to visit, pick up mom's check from work, visit mom at work, see my pediatrician (once before he moved out of the hospital and into his own office), and now recently to see my OBGYN. Going to the lab for them to take my blood was perhaps the worst thing I have ever encountered so far besides getting my shots (1. I hate needles 2. I like my blood in my body thankyou!)
Then came my doctor's predictions that I will more than likely be a C/S if my baby is over 5 lbs, just because I'm so small and I'll more than likely get serious tears or injure myself or the baby because my pelvic bones will not stretch enough (doctor did NOT tell me this to scare me away from a natural birth. I'm on Team Get the baby out!) So now I deal with surgery.
I do not think any amount of drugs will prepare me for either delivery method. I literally pale at the thought of beign sliced open, stitches, needles, and (UGH) catheters. (Nothing against natural home births, but I just don't feel safe doing one, so it's not even close to being an option)
Anyone else share hospital anxiety? I think I just need to hear less horror stories revolving around births, maybe that's ease my nerves? I was alright after giving my blood samples, I could probably do it again with less anxiety, hopefully once I get through this experience, I'll man up and finally fly on an airplane LOL