2 weeks ago today, I lost my job. Now. How to be a SAHM..

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-14-2012
2 weeks ago today, I lost my job. Now. How to be a SAHM..
3
Wed, 11-28-2012 - 11:44am

Hello Ladies!

I pop on here once and a while.. but not often. Of course, now I have become a house wife/SAHM for the first time in my life.. I'm considering staying that way at least for the next 4 to 6 months. I have split custody of my daughter who is 3 1/2 yrs old, so I'll be staying with her half the week, the other days with her dad, she'll be in daycare. 

My job.. sigh. I got pregnant 1 month after being hired on at the place. And while I had my areas that could use improvement, cause for termination seemed lacking. I don't agree with it one bit. And to give you an idea what kind of employee I am.. this is the first time in my adult life I'd been let go from a job. And I'm 32 yrs old. I'm not the type to jump job to job. In fact my previous job I had been with for nearly 6 years, and it was a completely different career type. Sadly the industry I was working for changed so dramatically, my desire to continue in that field became very conflicting. So I left.. for a job that canned me 6 months later. ANYWAY..

On to the positive :) I've never been the house wife type. I've never been able to afford to be! Nor do I feel I'm someone who's as self motivated in the home as some woman are wonderful at being. I have struggled with depression on and off most of my life, but over all I'm familiar with the signs and so is my now husband.. I go to counseling and do my best to keep my head in the right place! But combining the fact I've NEVER been the stay at home type.. with the fact -in my opinion- I was wrongly fired at 6 months pregnant just before the holidays, and just after my husband and I got married. Happy holidays to meeee!! LOL.. but you know.. now.. it's like this lil bean will have momma home long enough at the beginning of her life to get the benefits her sister got. My daughter from my previous marraige.. I was home with her the first 12 weeks of her life. If I weren't.. I don't think she'd have been breast fed for nearly 6 months like she was! It was a struggle getting the hang of it. And we never quite got it right. But with stick-to-it-iveness, a nipple sheild, and a medical grade breast pump.. we did good hanging in :)

Any tips for a 32 yr old woman who is entering the world of the stay at home mom/house wife for the first time? I know I need some sort of routine. I want to get some daily excercise to prepare for child birth, and give myself better health and energy.. since I have much more time on my hands now, there's little excuse. I only have my 3 yr old half the time. It's the lack of structure that I think I'll struggle with.. so I need to make that structure for myself. I tend to procrastinate on things non work related...

Hope everyone's pregnancy is going wonderfully! I'm 26 wks and this is my husband's first child. He is so excited and while he LOVES his step-daughter dearly, I know that he missed out the process from the get go. I wasn't sure.. wasnt' really planning to have more once the divorce went through. But when he and I meant.. the more we fell into 'us'.. the more we talked about it.. the more I wanted to see him be that daddy.. go through the miracle that is creating, growing, and delivering our own little bundle that was born of our love. It's exciting :)

Happy Wednesday Ladies!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2003
First of all... (((HUGS!))) Second, everything happens or a reason so embrace it and enjoy all the time you can get with your little one. I've been a SAHM for almost 9 years now and while it's definitely challenging, it's also a joy. It took me a long time to figure things out... and I'm still getting there. I'm a structure person, so having a routine is important for me. For example, if I don't make myself get up early before everyone else and get myself in order for the day everything goes downhill from there! :) For me, that entails reading a devotional, a bit of journaling, showering, getting the coffee going, making a list for the day and maybe prepping for breakfast before I hear little feet coming down the stairs. I'm on bed rest at the moment, but if I was allowed to exercise, I'd workout during that time, too. :) That bit of time totally preserves my sanity and gets me going in the right direction for the rest of the day. I have kids that are older and we home school so getting everyone dressed and started on lessons and chores right away is important for us. Mondays and Tuesdays are "down days" for our family where we don't really have to be anywhere, so I schedule in most of the house cleaning, bill paying, etc, for those days. And I always, ALWAYS, take my afternoon coffee break. That's pretty critical, too. :) I don't know if any of that information is helpful, but that's what works for us! Glad to have you around! Kelly
Proud mama to 3 princesses... Anna Jubilee (6), Sadie Lael, (4) and Abigail Lo
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2003

First of all...  (((HUGS!)))  Second, everything happens or a reason so embrace it and enjoy all the time you can get with your little one. 

I've been a SAHM for almost 9 years now and while it's definitely challenging, it's also a joy.  It took me a long time to figure things out... and I'm still getting there.  I'm a structure person, so having a routine is important for me. 

For example, if I don't make myself get up early before everyone else and get myself in order for the day everything goes downhill from there!  :)  For me, that entails reading a devotional, a bit of journaling, showering, getting the coffee going, making a list for the day and maybe prepping for breakfast before I hear little feet coming down the stairs.  I'm on bed rest at the moment, but if I was allowed to exercise, I'd workout during that time, too.  :)  That bit of time totally preserves my sanity and gets me going in the right direction for the rest of the day. 

I have kids that are older and we home school so getting everyone dressed and started on lessons and chores right away is important for us.  Mondays and Tuesdays are "down days" for our family where we don't really have to be anywhere, so I schedule in most of the house cleaning, bill paying, etc, for those days. 

And I always, ALWAYS, take my afternoon coffee break.  That's pretty critical, too.  :)

I don't know if any of that information is helpful, but that's what works for us!  Glad to have you around!

Kelly

Proud mama to 3 princesses... Anna Jubilee (6), Sadie Lael, (4) and Abigail Lo
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2004

I'm sorry about your job!  That's awful! 

I'm recently a SAHM, too, due to prengnancy complications.  It's been a change, because I have an almost 4 year old home with me and he is ALL boy!  LoL  I'll be staying home until he starts Kindergarten in a few years.  Child care cost would be to much to have both him and the baby going. 

Staying at home has been a change that I have embraced.  :)  My two older boys have really benefited from it, as they both have high functioning Autism.  So no more crappy after school program for them!  Now they ride the special ed bus home, and love it!  They think they are big and cool kids!  LoL  It's cute!

By the way, you should look up our FB group!  There are 15 of us ladies from this board there, and it's a lot more active!  :)  Here is the link:  http://www.facebook.com/#!/groups/march2013ec/  If you have a hard time getting the link to work, search for March 2013 Expecting Club.  Hope to see you there!  :)

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