Mixed emotions...?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2011
Mixed emotions...?
1
Tue, 08-13-2013 - 12:54pm

Okay... so this is #3 for me, #2 for the hubs.  We tried for almost 3 years to get pregnant with our last, so when we finally saw the + sign, we were ecstatic! Now here we are, a little over a year since we had our DD, and we are pregnant again. We weren't trying, but also not preventing. I am 38 so we decided to leave the "window open" until I was 39 or so, and then start preventing. And I think because it took so long to get pregnant last time, that both of us just assumed we wouldn't get pregnant again. But lo and behold, that + sign showed up! We are happy, but instead of crying tears of happiness we both just stood there staring at the test in disbelief. My husband is a full-time student, and graduates this year. A few months later, I will be taking my maternity leave. Things will be so tight if he doesn't get a job right away... there is just a lot of different factors this time around. I just want to feel happy and get excited, but for some reason I haven't allowed myself to. I'm nervous about telling my oldest daughter (11) there's going to be another baby, I'm nervous to tell my job I'm taking another leave (since I got cracks about my age last time, I can only imagine)... and my moods have been allllll over the place, just not a happy happy joy joy place. Hoping the excitement will kick in after my first appointment next week.  Has anyone else been having mixed emotions about their pregnancy?  It's like I feel guilty feeling the way I've been feeling.  Bottom line is I know it is such a blessing for us to be having another baby, it's just all a little overwhelming right now I think....

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2013
Wed, 08-14-2013 - 12:13pm

Yes. I have mixed emotions too. I have two DD's ages 7 and 5. I always wanted a 3rd, but kept putting it off until we had the right house, and I had the right job. We got the house 3 yrs ago and I got the job 2 years ago. Of course I didn't want to get preggo right away with a new job so we waited until this summer. I got preggo immediately and I'm mostly thrilled, but there is part of me asking myself what am I doing?? Life was good and easy. The girls are at a great age and everything was going so smoothly. Now I'm starting to think about the baby and all the chaos that comes with them. Not to mention I'm the only person that can do my job so while I'm out everything will just pile up for me until I get back and that will stress me during my leave. I'm also older and pregnancy seems much harder this time around. I'll be 38 when the baby is born and wonder how I'm going to survive the nightly feedings. BUT aside from all of that, I'm very happy and I know it will all work out and I'll look back and wonder what I was so nervous about. (I hope)