overly anxious and emotional

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2008
overly anxious and emotional
4
Thu, 07-26-2012 - 11:52pm

I'm 22 weeks today and I've been crying at the drop of a hat. Mostly to country songs. I'm feeling the baby kick regularly now and I'm bonding with HIM (as opposed to the abstract baby that I knew was in there somewhere...).  It seems like I'm constantly holding my breath  trying to get to the next milestone that will make me feel comfortable with this pregnancy. I'm almost, but quite at the viable age. I have a feeling I will never stop worrying.

My blood pressure has been creeping back up to my pre-pregnancy numbers. The first 20 weeks naturally lowered it to normal levels. My numbers aren't crazy high (130's/80's at the highest), but I still worry that it will progress into pre-e. My mom had it with my older brother.

I've spent the majority of my pregnancy cautiously optimistic and somewhat detached. Now that I've let myself bond and get excited about the baby, I can't even imagine how I'd feel if something were to go wrong.

Sorry I'm being such a debbie downer. I'm just having a hard time getting past my fears.

Julie - eagerly awaiting DH's homecoming & the arrival of our first DS, due 11/29/12

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2008
Re: overly anxious and emotional
Sat, 07-28-2012 - 12:19am
Thanks, I'm feeling much better today. It's good to be able to talk about it with other pregnant folk :smileyhappy:

Julie - eagerly awaiting DH's homecoming & the arrival of our first DS, due 11/29/12

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2007
Sat, 07-28-2012 - 12:41pm
I can relate, so don't feel like it's just you! Even though this is #5 for us, I still have worries and sometimes feel like it's difficult to really connect with the baby. Calling her by name, for some reason, is something I've struggled with. I agree with Leona, just try to focus on the positive and know that we're over halfway through this!

--Heather-- proud mommy to five amazing kids and one more on the way!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2007
Sun, 07-29-2012 - 2:22pm

Some people actually get a version of "postpartum" depression DURING pregnancy.  Don't be afraid to talk to your doctor about your feelings because the hormones associated with anxiety and depression (in severe cases--which it doesn't sound like you have, but just saying) are not good for the baby either.  Quite a few people in my DS's PG ended up getting on anti-anxiety and/or anti-depressant meds around the middle of the pregnancy for similar feelings and it made a world of difference for them---definitely something to consider if you think it might help you!

Personally, I dealt with infertility from undiagnosed gluten sensitivity and it took us 3 years to get pregnant with DS.  During this time I had many chemical pregnancies and a later loss, as well, at 7.5 weeks.  When I actually got pregnant I still was not sure about how much gluten was affectiing things for me and still eating some--I had to be on progesterone and had spotting during the first few weeks of pregnancy--this finally inspired me to cut out all gluten and it definitely helped.  

Anyway I just wanted to share because I felt like I was waiting for disaster to strike for the entire pregnancy (with DS).  First I was waiting for the first tri to be over, and then for viability, and then I was worried about stillbirth or delivery complications, and even after he was born I was SO afraid of SIDS that I kept myself from connecting with him until he was over a year old.  All of this transpired into wicked post-partum depression that affected every aspect of my life and my experience with motherhood and it took me a LONG LONG time to recover from.  I was still dealing with it when I got pregnant this time around.  

Luckily for me my emotions/psychology is MOST stable when I'm pregnant--just how it works for me.  But my plan is to start trying to find an anti-depressant and/or a anti-anxiety med that will work for me as soon as little man is born.  I'm not going to wait this time because my entire first experience of motherhood was completely affected by my fears.

Hopefully you and/or your doctor can make a plan that will help you feel more in control and less afraid.  I've also heard that the pregnancy and birth class "Birthing From Within" is extremely therapeutic in dealing with pregnancy, delivery, and motherhood-associated fear and anxiety.  

Hopefully some of this will help you, (((HUGS))) Mama.  You are doing great and your baby is going to be great.  Just take care of YOU.   

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2008
Sun, 07-29-2012 - 3:28pm
Thank you for sharing. I'm not sure how much of this is pregnancy related and what is just my normal, high-strung self. I've talked to my doctor a little bit about my anxiety and she has encouraged me to call whenever I need to. However, I KNOW that a lot of my fears are irrational and overreactions, so I don't want to "bother" anyone. I try to deal with a lot of this myself. But I will definitely consider medication of some sort if I feel like it's getting too bad. I've never been on anything and I'm not keen on it (if I can help it). But I don't want my son to suffer because of my deficits, especially if I can help them! Thank you again sharing your experience :smileyhappy:

Julie - eagerly awaiting DH's homecoming & the arrival of our first DS, due 11/29/12