are you kidding me??!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2008
are you kidding me??!!
7
Fri, 08-31-2012 - 9:43pm

So tonight DH and I are sitting on the couch just chilling out and i asked if he would massage my feet and he started to, but only did it like 5 minutes total! He started complaining that his thumbs were hurting and while ill take what i can get its the ONLY time i have EVER asked for him to do it...i never asked when i was pg with Jacob and i feel like "well dont get me started on what hurts on me bud!!!!" anyone else not getting anything out of DH? I mean he even gave me a look like what did you just ask me to do. UGH i dont think im being unreasonable....

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2008
Fri, 08-31-2012 - 10:27pm
Omg ugh. Sorry :smileysad: you should ask him to treat you to one if those foot bath spa things that you buy at bed bath and beyond we used to have one and I miss it. My hubby can be the same way. When my husband and I are in bed I always sleep on the left side because it is closest to the bathroom lol. A couple of times he has said please scratch my back but if I ask him to do it its like for a couple of seconds :smileysad:
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2011
Fri, 08-31-2012 - 11:26pm

Ugg.  He should definitely be more helpful.  You're having his baby, he should do everything he can for you.  If he isn't willing to rub your feet, make him pay for a pedicure.

As for me, I don't much from DH... Dh has been to the chiropracter or massage place a dozen times this pregnancy, complaining his back hurts, but I've never been once.  When I say I want to do something like that to pamper myself, and ask for money, he says okay but then wants to balance the checkbook first, and complains so much about money that I give in and don't go.  When I ask for a little attention because I'm so freakin bored laying around all day, he complains that he's too tired from cooking and cleaning.  Lol, I didn't realize frozen pizza and loading the dishwasher was such hard work.  I purposefully didn't do our bedsheets and complained about them often, hoping he'd do the laundry just once.  I held out for over 2 months, finally sleeping on the couch, before washing them myself.  I honestly think men are just clueless sometimes.

Momma to:
Madelyn, February 26, 2001
Aaron, January 2, 2005
Baby #3, October 2, 2012

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2008
Sat, 09-01-2012 - 1:09am

hes like that even when im not pregnant! im just glad im not alone and at the same time feel for ya'll too :smileysad: i dont get it....i just had a pedi/massage that i won from the local news channel but still i take care of a toddler all day and spend all day by myself and then let him go to the gym every day after work!! so i see him a total of about 3 hrs in the afternoon before he's in bed during the week. the least he could do is rub my damn feet for more then 5 min the ONE time i ask in 2 1/2 years! GAH! lol im so ready for the pregnancy to be over...i want my body back asap! Thanks ladies!

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Community Leader
Registered: 02-06-2006
Sat, 09-01-2012 - 7:55am
Girl I hear you! My husband jammed his thumb badly a couple months ago and will totally pull out the, "but my thumb hurts waahhhhhh" excuse when I occasionally ask him to rub my feet.

And I don't even want a foot massage so much as I want him to push the fluid out of my ankles back up into my calves on the rare days when I have a bit of swelling there.

Men are so lazy sometimes. Mine is the worst, generally about back rubs and the like. I don't know if he's honestly terrible at giving them, or if he just does it purposely so I don't bother asking. If that's his plan, it's not working! I just get him to do it and then bark at him the whole time about how to do it right. It'd be easier on him to just do it and not suck!

It's weird because it's pretty much the only way in which my husband is lazy. He will run himself ragged doing things for me, taking care of me, etc. But when it comes to non-sexual rubbing of body parts, he's like a reticent child.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2008
Sat, 09-01-2012 - 9:33am
I laid my feet in DH's lap yesterday and he laughed at me. My fave was the other night when he said we should do backrubs, so I started on him. And then he fell asleep.

He has admitted that since I'm not a complainer, he knows I really do need something if I ask for it. He's just not so good with the follow through.
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