back again...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2009
back again...
Mon, 11-01-2010 - 5:59am
I can not believe I am back here again for the second time.
Some of you may know me but some of you newer ladies may not.
Sept 9 2009 I lost my daughter Alexis Lynn at 20w6d. My doctor couldn't give me a 100% reason why but incompetent cervix was one of the possibilitys. My DH and I decided to start trying again right away. The following June we were thrilled to be expecting again.
I was very nervous and scared but at 12weeks started weekly cervical measurements. We did determine by those that my cervix was on the shorter side of normal but it appeared to be holding up really well and my amniotic bag was not ever funneling. All this changed when I went in for my 19week check. I was devastated to learn I was dilated to 3cm and bulging. After spending a night on my head in the hospital I was blessed to be able to get an emergency cerclage. After almost 2 weeks of ups and downs my bag was once again bulging through my stitch. I had no other option but delivery and actually delivered before my stitch was even all out.
Otis Mason was born on Oct 8 2010 at 21w5d.
Needless to say I am in shock that this has happened once again. My husband and I have no other children and just celebrated our 2yr anniversary 10days after Otis was born.
Because I have been down this road before I know what to expect. I know it is a long and tough road and that you will truly never ever be the same again. Although I do know that happiness does return and you will one day be able to smile and think of your little one once again.
I look forward to getting to know you newer ladies and hope some way I will be of a help to you as I am grieving the loss of both of my precious babies.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2010
Mon, 11-01-2010 - 12:12pm


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2007
Tue, 11-02-2010 - 3:28pm

I am so very sorry for your losses.

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2010
Tue, 11-02-2010 - 10:49pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2007
Thu, 11-04-2010 - 12:22pm

Courtney, thank you for posting.

Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2007
Wed, 12-08-2010 - 2:59am

I am so very sorry. That is just awful and pray for your healing. It takes so much courage and faith to try again and to have it happen again is unimadinable. My son, Elliott was stillborn on 10/15/10 at 26.3 weeks. We don't know what happended. His cord was "hypertwisted" but no one is really blaming the death on that. I have a daughter (Addison) who will be 4 in Feb. I look forwad to getting to know you. -Alex

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2006
Mon, 02-14-2011 - 7:49pm

I'm so sorry for your loss. I too am back again after 2 years. 2 weeks ago I lost my baby girl Leigh at 20 weeks. Everything was going so well and then out of the blue my water broke. The same thing happened with my first loss(Liam)(also 20 weeks). Going through labor and delivery wasn't the worst.It was when my angel came into the world....The SILENCE when there should