how long did you wait?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2009
how long did you wait?
8
Thu, 11-26-2009 - 7:22pm
I lost my first child almost two months ago, at 34 weeks, due to stillbirth. I felt so blessed being pregnant and was having a perfect pregnancy and then out of no where, it all ended much too soon.
My husband and I know we want to try again and of course I have read all the info out there as far as waiting 3-6 months, a full year for emotional purposes, "when your desire to have a child is greater than your fear of losing another" etc.
I have been reading posts on this board since the day I came home from the hospital and thought it to be about time that I join. I feel as women it is important for us to stick together on what I believe to be one of the roughest of roads.
I am just curious, when did you all start trying after your loss and how did you know you were ready? If you were able to conceive after your loss, how long did it take you?
Blessings
Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2009
Fri, 11-27-2009 - 4:46pm

I am so sorry for your lose.


My daughter, Emory Elizabeth was born sleeping 7/8/09 at 38 wks due to a cord accident. Our DR wanted us to wait 3 "normal" cycles before trying again. I couldn't do it. AF showed 4 wks after Emory's death and stayed 2 wks. After that we decided to start trying. I am only 2 wks away from 39 so that clock is ticking.


My next cycle was VERY long. I finally O'd on CD72 and got a BFP 16 days later. I am not sure that I am ready for this, even though it is what I wanted. I am 8 wks on the 30th and that is when I have my first appointment. I can not put up a ticker or join the pregnancy board until I hear a heartbeat. The only people that know are my DH,

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2009
Fri, 11-27-2009 - 5:43pm

Thank you Melissa and congratulations. I'm sure you will hear that heartbeat and that it will be the sweetest sound you have heard in months.

I have only had one short cycle since my pp bleeding stopped and that was within a couple of days and am hoping that it comes again soon, only for planning and knowing dates etc. I try not to over think my cycle but have this weird fear that my body could not support a pregnancy and that it is now failing me. I know that is not true but is just where I am with the healing process. I need to know it is working before we start to try again. And you are correct that some days the thought seems absurd but other days, it is all that gives me hope.
I am finding the message boards a great place to remember that unfortunately, I am not alone. I find comfort in sharing and learning from others and my hope is that through my experience I may help others one day too.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

Susie

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2009
Sat, 11-28-2009 - 8:36pm

Hi there.

I am sorry to welcome you to this board, but it is a great support group. I lost my baby girl at 36 weeks from a cord accident in August. The grieving process has been a tough one, I never know what the day, hour or minute will bring.

I too am eager to be pregnant again, but know how scared I will be when I am. Unfortunately, I have no AF since the delivery, and am still just waiting for my body to recover and get "back to normal." The waiting is so hard.

I wish you the best of luck.

-Lis

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2009
Sun, 11-29-2009 - 10:18am
Thank you Lis.
Sending love and hope right back to you.
Susie
Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2006
Sun, 11-29-2009 - 10:58am
I am so sorry for you loss. I waited 1 month and a half. With Angela we got pg on the first try but that didn't happen this time. I am blaming stress.
Nicole
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-27-2009
Sun, 11-29-2009 - 12:04pm

My daughter, Taylor Jade,

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2008
Sun, 11-29-2009 - 1:25pm
We lost Adam at 21 weeks on Oct 17th and we started trying this week.
Susan
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2005
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 10:26am

I am so sorry for your loss...


I had a great pregnancy also with Kimberly, that ended much too short at 31 weeks.


My first AF arrived about 7 weeks after we lost Kimberly on April 10, 2009.

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