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left behind
| Fri, 01-07-2011 - 12:01pm |
Hi
Lately I have had such a mix of emotions. I am so so so happy for the angel moms who have had their rainbow baby or who have gotten their bfp. But I feel so alone sometimes. I am one of the only ones left. It's been almost ten months and my heart has healed some. But we have been dealing with fertility issues and no answers.right now other than needing more time and less stress the doctors say. We r also starting the adoption process. But how does one keep staying hopeful when you r the last one left...or at least it feels like that right now...
Lately I have had such a mix of emotions. I am so so so happy for the angel moms who have had their rainbow baby or who have gotten their bfp. But I feel so alone sometimes. I am one of the only ones left. It's been almost ten months and my heart has healed some. But we have been dealing with fertility issues and no answers.right now other than needing more time and less stress the doctors say. We r also starting the adoption process. But how does one keep staying hopeful when you r the last one left...or at least it feels like that right now...
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i just want u to know elena i understand your pain.
i feel your pain ladies. i had my still birth 1.23 08.
Carissa
I have felt that very same way for a VERY long time..............I can't even post much anymore b/c I feel like a broken record. It's been 2years
Kandis- Mommy to Isaiah Daniel born sleeping 10/23/2008
Forever missing my sweet little boy....You are forever ours Is
Hi,
I lost my son a little over nine months ago and I feel the same way.
Thank u so much for your encouraging words. It so nice having the supper of other angel moms. It is so hard dealing with all the emotions and fertility issue at the same time. Sometimes its so nice to vent. I have followed you since I have been on the site. I am so happy for you and the happiness you have found. How r things going with u?
Thank you so much for your support. Its sometimes just nice to know that I am not alone with my feelings. It is so frustrating when losing a child, with no answers and then having ferility issues. I know how expensive, exhausting, and frustrating it can be. I know I have not been on this journey as long as you, but I have the same exact feelings. Right now we have stopped with all the fertility treatments because it was just so stressful for me. And the doctor really had no answers for us said that just needed to relax and see what happens in a year from now. I was frustrated kind of by that so we are starting the adoption process. It's a long process, but it gives me hope and makes me feel like we are moving on somewhat and have something else to focus on.
How are things going with you? Are you doing fertility treatments.
Carissa
I hope that your husband changes his mind :) I can't imagine how hard that is. I too pray that we will all get the happiness that we all deserve.
Thanks!
We're currently trying to decide what we want to do................. We did a lot of fertility treatments in the past year. We did everything but IVF, and Injectibles. We tried Femara,which I respond amazingly to! Clomid, which I am restistant to. Triggered ovulation, timed BD and IUI, Triggers and IUI, Metformin, and a billion follicle studies.
My dr is absolutely great, but he can't tell me what is wrong. Every time I go in, I cry. I was diagnosed with hypothyroid, and I have polycystic ovaries, but neither of those spell out the fertility death sentence we've experienced. In june I had a huge breakdown after a perfect cycle, perfectly timed IUI loads of follicles that ended in yet another BFN. I snapped and had to walk away.
We didn't have any trouble conceiving our Angel, so we just don't understand. If one more person tells me "calm down, its stress, you need to relax" Im going to punch them :) (i mean that as nicely as possible too! haha)
It's just hard, It really is, having fertility issues on top of the grief is so hard, and most dont understand the added toll that it takes on a person..... We've considered adoption, but we spent all of our savings over the past two years doing all of these treatments..... what a waste :(
Im usually not on here too often, so if you want, you are more than welcome to email me. its kandistubb@ymail.com
I look forward to hearing from you!
Kandis- Mommy to Isaiah Daniel born sleeping 10/23/2008
Forever missing my sweet little boy....You are forever ours Is
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