iVillage Member
Registered: 11-05-2009
Sun, 12-20-2009 - 12:18am

I am sorry that I always have to come on here to vent but sometimes I feel like you all are the only ones who understand!

My BIL and SIL had a baby about a month ago. I have had a hard time dealing with it, and fortunately they don't live in the same town or state, and I haven't had to see the baby. It's been very hard to deal with because our baby was the first grandbaby on that side, although it will never feel that way. I am not close to SIL, and she has not even made an attempt to talk to me since our loss in July. No card or anything after our loss. Anyway, she sends something today and guess what she sent? Thank goodness that I don't open Christmas cards for that reason. My MIL is here visiting and my husband opened the card and I heard him comment on the baby. Come on, are you kidding me? Why in the world would anybody do that? Go ahead and rub it in my face that you have a baby for Christmas, and I don't. Some people are so THOUGHTLESS and for me it has to be someone in the family!

Lilypie First Birthday tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2005
In reply to: chelle4ua
Sun, 12-20-2009 - 8:22am

I am so sorry that you had to go through that... I know that this time of year is proving, at least for me, to be difficult.

I try to remember that others who have never been through the kind of loss and pain that we all have do not have a clue about what they do/send/say. These small things add up over time and we are more sensitive than they ever will be.

I do hope that you put all those cards away... sometimes not seeing them does help.

Hugs to you today

danielle-1.png picture by danielle1217

new-york-rangers.gif image by danielle1217



iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2008
In reply to: chelle4ua
Sun, 12-20-2009 - 9:23am

((((HUGS)))) I'm sorry you had to experience that. I've been holding my breath waiting for the Christmas cards to come but so far, thankfully, they haven't. I know it must have been difficult. Unfortunately, on this journey, I've found and I'm sure you have too, that people are often very

(Mom to Eli, our dear son, born into heaven July 25, 2008)

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2008
In reply to: chelle4ua
Sun, 12-20-2009 - 9:47am

I'm so sorry. I am hoping I don't get anything this year. I have a hard enough time seeing babies everywhere shopping!

The only thing I want to get in the mail is my free pregnancy tests!