Why I DON'T Do Trick or Treat

Community Leader
Registered: 01-03-2004
Why I DON'T Do Trick or Treat
Wed, 10-17-2012 - 8:34pm


I wonder if anyone here has some input on their experience either as a parent with a child who trick or treats, or as someone who buys candy and hands it out on Halloween?

First of all, I'm not a parent or a grandparent. I have about two dozen godchildren, a niece and several nephews, and various and sundry other children in my life via relatives, friends, and neighbors. So, I have kids in my life, just not MY kids or grandkids.

That said, I wanted to say I stopped participating in trick or treat activities in my neighborhood about 5 years ago, and here's why: 

I was astounded at how many children made rude or ugly comments about the amount of candy or brand of candy I dropped into their treat bags. I took a year off after that thinking maybe it was just the weather or the dark or a bad day, and I participated again.

Same thing. 

Let me say I LIKE watching the kids march up and down the street in their costumes. I think it's fun to see kids dress up and what kind of characters they are, who has homemade costumes and whose are store bought. I enjoy seeing parents walk with their kids. I like the idea the one night a year we can stand our porch and people we have never met in our lives will walk right up and delight us with 'trick or treat!'

Call me naive, but I wasn't prepared for the condescending, rude, and at times, nasty comments that were made about my "gift" of candy.

The one kid and one comment that did me in was this one: I dropped in a bite-sized candy bar into his treat bag, which was absolutely bulging with candy only to hear, "Is that all?" His parents were right behind him. I guess the look on my face said it all as they hurried their child away to the next house. They didn't correct him or say "Uh, gee, you've got a whole bag of candy all ready!"

I am not a cheapskate but I buy the brand and amount of candy I can afford to give away and when it's gone, it's gone. I don't buy huge candy bars or big bags of name brand chocolate bars because I can't afford to give many of those away. So, I try for a happy medium and buy a store brand of candy in a mini-size or small packages so I can give away more.

So after that Halloween I lock my doors, shut off my porch lights, pull the shades and head into the interior of the house the watch TV and wait for trick or treat to be over.

When did kids become so rude? And where does this entitlement attitude come about the brand and size of the candy that's offered? Where are the parents on this? 

It saddens me to not participate in this little ritual, but I had more than one kid say something or roll their eyes at my "free" candy when I handed it out. So, I just save my money and my frustration and I stay inside. I figure if they're that particular and that ungrateful they can keep walking.

Parents? What do you teach your kids about this ritual and what do you expect in terms of amount, size or brand of candy from Halloween? I'd really like to know.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2012
Fri, 10-19-2012 - 2:00pm

I have 2 toddlers, so they think halloween is fun, and it is really fun to take them out.  But I make them say "Thank you" at every house, and I do not want them getting a lot of candy - I have to throw most of it away or they would eat themselves sick.  But I have noticed more "rude" kids when we get home from our little trot around the block and start handing out candy.  So you should not feel bad for not participating!  I probably would have said something to the parents if a kid was that rude to me!