The Idea Vs the Reality

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2009
The Idea Vs the Reality
2
Thu, 02-16-2012 - 5:28pm

Hi, new to this board. I guess I just wanted an outlet to hear myself think and get some feedback if any of you are in a similar situation. I have a 4 (almost 5 year old) daughter and a 19 month old son. I don't know

Lilypie First Birthday tickers

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2011
Fri, 02-17-2012 - 3:17pm
Hi Nicki! I've been struggling with this myself. I also have 2 kids and although have thought of having another, also really worried about upsetting the good balance we have right now.

It's just seems foreign to think that my baby days could be over, it makes me feel old! I also love the infant stage, but it's some of the others stages make me apprehensive about it. We have a pretty nice life now, and the kids are getting more independent so that is also a factor for me. Do I want to backtrack and lose some of the free time I'm slowly getting? It totally doesn't help when you know people who are having babies, I always feel a bit left out. It's such a magical time, and it's sad that I might never experience that again.

I really don't know if I have any advice for you, but you aren't alone in feeling that. Maybe it will help when you see their babies becoming demanding toddlers ;) Do you think you can get in enough baby time with your sister's child to offset these feelings?

 photo abbysummer_zps85da8a35.jpg

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2009
Sun, 02-19-2012 - 8:31pm

Thanks Abby!. Yes, I feel you on the upsetting the balance of things....2 is a nice, manageable number. And with me having one of each I always worry that my son would be left out if I had another girl or vica verca. On bad days I couldn't imagine dealing with another one, and on the good days I can so imagine another one! I definitely will spend a lot of time with my sister's child (a boy due in June) so that will probably be the real deciding factor once he arrives - I will either get my baby fix through my nephew and be happy to hand him back when he fusses, or my baby fever will go into overdrive!

Irregardless of what the future holds, I do feel complete with my kids. After my daughter was born I immediately knew I wanted another one, and I didn't really get that feeling initially after I had my son. Its just now creeping up on me since he is getting out of that baby phase and of course it doesn't help when everyone around you is pregnant!!!

Good luck to you! Nicki

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