Deciding How long I should Wait
Find a Conversation
|Mon, 07-21-2008 - 3:53pm|
I am 26, DH is 27, we have been married for a few months. We are both starting grad school next semester. He will be quitting his job to go to school full time. I will be the only one working, and I will also be going to school most nights. I should be done with school by Dec 2009 or April 2010. I am going to be supporting the both of us while he finishes med school, which will be in 2011. Thankfully I make pretty good money to support the both of us, in fact I make about as much as the average middle class family household income. My career has always been the priority in my life and the same for my DH. We want to make a good life for ourselves in preparation for a family, so that we could give our kids a good life. Recently, for the past year or so I have been having some serious desires to be a mom, call it age, call it maternal instinct. I cannot stop thinking about how much I want to have a baby, how much I want to be a mother, I seriously fantasize so much about it I am starting to question if its even normal. The current “plan” we have is to wait till we are BOTH done with school, this would mean I would be TTC when I am close to 30. The thought of waiting that long to have a baby is very disappointing to me, and it scares me in so many ways. I don’t want to be one of those women who wait for the perfect time to get pregnant and then find that I’ve waited too long and I have to have fertility treatments or something like that. I’m wondering how realistic is our plan and how much longer we are going to postpone having a baby. Once he finishes med school he may say he wants to wait to pay off debt, or become a resident, I don’t know, theres always a reason why its never the right time to have a baby. I haven’t talked to this about him, he just thinks I agree with our “plan” because realistically he is right. If I get pregnant now it will basically ruin my chances for a promotion but if I wait 3 years I fear that I would have wished I had kids sooner. I want to have 2 or 3. I know I need to talk to my DH about this, but i know he will think I’m crazy.