Introducing Myself...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Introducing Myself...
Fri, 05-09-2003 - 1:42pm
Hi, all! I'm Crystal, and I've lurked here for a few months. Here's my story: I'm getting married 7/5/03, and my DF can't wait to start a family. We're both 25, and he has this major longing to be a father. Anyway, I finally feel like this is the right time and place in my life to have a child (not to say that I'm not scared to death!), but we do need to wait for a little while. Due to a situation that occurred before I met DF, I have about $6,500 in credit card debt to get rid of before I'm comfortable with having a baby, and once that's paid off, we're going to buy a house (summer of 2004). And I really want to have our own house to raise a family in, for many reasons. So, because of those situations, I'm working 2 jobs, about 50+ hrs/wk, and he works alot at his job, about 63 hrs/wk. So, obviously, neither one of us have time for BD'ing, much less raising a child! Plus, I was on the Depo shot for BC (a regular at that board) and my last shot wore off 12 weeks ago, so it's not very likely that I'll even be able to get pregnant within the next 6 months anyway.

But my DF is practically insane with wanting a child! I know a lot of it has to do with the fact that his parents divorced, and he wants to give a child what he never had, emotions-wise. But he talks about it constantly! He always wants me to hang out with his friends across the street that have a 1 yr old daughter, so I can "get more into the maternal feeling thing"! I laugh about it, so it's not really a bad thing, I just find it unusual that it's the man who has baby-fever instead of the woman!

Anyway, that's my story, and I'll probably visit here often, so thanks for listening!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 05-09-2003 - 2:06pm
Welcome to the board Crystal.

My story is completely opposite of yours--we've been married almost 5 1/2 years and I've wanted a baby for the last two years. DH has only known about my baby fever for the last year, but he's been incredibly reluctant until recently. Our plan now is to try before the end of 2003. Nothing like having a target date--LOL.

Anyway, I think your plan to wait until the debt is paid off and you've found a house is a good one. It will allow you and DH some time to be together as married folk before a baby is tossed in the mix. Plus, as your debt decreases, maybe you can both cut back on the long hours. You are both still young so it is not like your 40 and deciding you want a baby. It is awesome that your DH is that excited. If my DH was that excited and cooperative, I'd probably have 8 or 12 kids!! I'll be lucky to get one and ecstatic for two!

I'm glad you decided to introduce yourself. Feel free to pop in on the discussions--we have a great group of ladies on this board--very kind and thoughtful women that have tons of experience in a variety of situations.

By the way, how much more wedding planning do you have to do?

Avatar for jlynna12
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 05-09-2003 - 2:43pm
Welcome! You sound a lot like me when I was 26 and met my DH. I had all the debt, he had none! haha. We are now soooo close to having it 100% paid off and in a position to pay any we put on in a month off each month. Welcome to the board, and glad to have you!

Jlynn, WTT #1 Aug/Sept 03 (I hope)


Jlynn, Momma to Asher and Ada

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 05-09-2003 - 7:01pm
Welcome, Crystal! It's wonderful to have you here--we LOVE delurkers! I'm glad to hear that your soon to be DH wants to have a baby; we have too many stubborn DHs around here to count, LOL! My anniversary is 7/4 (97) so we'll be celebrating almost together! It sounds like you have a good solid WTT plan and I look forward to getting to know you better. Thanks for introducing yourself!

Sarah (25), DH Ryan (29), DD Victoria (7/1/98), DS Hunter (9/22/00), and #3 due 7/10 (planning to induce on 7/2)


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 05-11-2003 - 4:15pm
Welcome Cystal to this wonderful board! Thank you for coming out of lurking and introducing yourself. Every woman here adds to the interesting mix of discussions we have. They are very supportive and a lot of them are experienced in these different emotions we face while WTT. My story is different from many women! I'm 33 and (DH and I) adopted a baby girl from China (Lana 11 1/2 months now)at 8 1/2 months. We go back and forth about having a large family or not, but I want one. The adoption is because we want kids and I don't physically want to have them all. My mother was adopted and I always felt that it's a normal part of life. Lana is such a blessing to DH and I that we can't wait for me to get pregnant and get her a sibling. We do intend to go back to China to adopt but after me having one or two children.

Again welcome and come post often!


WTT #2 (1st preg) 06/03 soon!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 05-12-2003 - 10:26am
This is SOOO HARD!! Yesterday, DF and I bought a kite and took the little 4 y/o girl across the street to the park to fly it. Seeing the three of us having so much fun, an onlooker would have thought we were having our own little fun family outing! I get around little ones and all my common sense flies out the window, and I start whining that I WANT ONE TOO! WAHHHH!!! Especially when I saw my DF kneeking down and teaching her how to hold the string to make it fly, and saw how she laughed when it nosedived on his head!

Oh, well! Think of other things!!!!