Not on the same page...

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2009
Not on the same page...
5
Sun, 01-10-2010 - 6:45pm

This February I start classes to become a CVA (Certified Vet Assistant) online at the U.S. Career Institute. In Jan. 2011 I hope to earn my AAS in Vet Technology to be a RVT (Registered Veterinary Technician) before I go back to San Jacinto College-South in Houston (GO COYOTES!) to get certified in Web Development, Web Design & Implementation, and Executive/Administrative Assisting. Afterwards I will finish my associate degree in 8-12 Education with teaching certifications in English/Reading/Language Arts and Computer Science at San Jac-South. From there i'll transfer back to Prairie View A&M to finish my BA in Education. Gah that's a mouthful. My goal is to utilize my certifications with a work at home position, and use my degree in Education to fall back on. I don't feel pressured to be in a housewife position, I actually want to cater to my future husband, but I also want to be productive in my own skin also.


Mark and I ARE on a different page. I want to try for another baby once i've completed my CVA certification, and have stabilized in a job, and HE wants me to finish my degree in education sooner, and financially support him while he goes to school, when I know plenty of people go to school and work at the same time, he says he "can't" do it...I think it's more like won't do it. People who have enough determination to go to school do it. I already know that i'm not mentally or physically stable enough to be the sole provider in a household (due to numerous mental/physicall disabilities). It could always be that way, or sometime it could change. My track record proves it. I've never been able to hold a job longer than 3 months. I don't want Mark to support me, he's too controlling for that, I want to bring in income to say that I play a part, but I know I can't BE the part, ya know?


It's like he wants the exact opposite of what I do. I don't want to wait until i'm in my 30's to have my first baby. Most of my friends are around my age and younger and already have TWO kids. Some of them have degrees, or at least some college, others don't, but what they DO have is a partner in their relationship who is already stable, or almost stable enough for them to start a family, or start one in the near future. At this rate, i'll graduate college in maybe 2014-2015 completely done with certifications and all, and THEN i'll have to get a fulltime job to suport us while Mark QUITS his to enroll in school, which will take another 4-5 years, so we're looking at 2020 now, i'll be in my mid 30's....AND he wants to wait until we have a house to start a family, and I don't want a house, for numerous reasons, which only puts me farther from my goals,....I feel like i'm getting nowhere fast here...


What do I do??

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Photobucket Siggy a
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-11-2005
Sun, 01-10-2010 - 9:48pm

Wow, that is A LOT going on...

Sounds like you have it planned out. The only thing I can really suggest is maybe suggest your BF enroll in one class at a time at a community college to start building up credits and maybe work toward a 4 year?

The other option could be... to maybe hold off on the BA. A BA is going to take awhile and if it is only a fall back and not a full time career path why not wait? It'll shave a couple years off the plan.

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Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2009
Sun, 01-10-2010 - 10:20pm

I really want the BA, it is (to me) a necessity, and i've already got my BA half done.


He's already told me that he wants to do his degree "all at one time" and can't do ANY of it while working. Whatever. At this point, we're not even speaking. This and other things have just pushed me to my limit and I feel like i'm at breaking point now. We either figure this crap out soon, and I mean like, really soon, or i'm moving in with my mom and finding someone that finds me worth it.

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Photobucket Siggy a
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2009
Wed, 01-13-2010 - 8:40pm

Lilypie Maternity tickers


May Baby

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2009
Wed, 01-13-2010 - 9:12pm
I don't think your post was offending at all, Andrea! I agree with you and Kristina, I hope that you find a path of happiness whatever you choose to do.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2006
Thu, 01-14-2010 - 11:32am

I don't think your post is offensive, Andrea.

 
 
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