Out of lurkdom (m)
Find a Conversation
|Mon, 07-14-2003 - 12:05pm|
For those who don't know me or don't remember me, here's a quick recap of my story.
DH and I have been married 5 1/2 years now and I've wanted a baby for about 2 years. DH is/was the king of the reluctant spouses, but in April or so (and after many arguments, discussions and millions of tears) we decided that sometime this fall (maybe as early as August) we would start TTC. DH is also a competitive distance runner and he hasn't wanted to give up his sport for anything, much less fatherhood, so the decision to TTC in the fall was like a major battlefield victory, especially because he had just gotten a new running coach. Mother's Day was incredibly hard for me--we had a celebration of mothers at church and DH and I had a huge fight afterwards over me being upset. Since then, I've kind of slipped away from any baby discussions and stuff like that, and while I've lurked on the board everyday, I've only posted a couple of times since. I've really tried to prepare myself for the possibility that he changes his mind and decides he doesn't want kids and how we'll move forward from there.
Now to the present: some of you may remember we bought tickets to two Metallica shows this summer and part of the TTC delay was because I didn't want to be pg at these insane events (the first show was Saturday and was totally AWESOME!!--I was at the rail the whole time--next show is this Saturday and I'm totally psyched and ready). Anyway, back to my point, one of his best friends and a fellow runner (they share the same coach) traveled to the Metallica concert with us this weekend and announced that their coach e-mailed him Friday and announced that he and his 40 year old wife of 16 years are expecting a baby. Needless to say, all of us are quite stunned (including the coach!). I can tell my DH is really thrown by this. Now I'm wondering what I should do or say to my DH. I think he thought they were quite happy without kids (and I'm fairly sure they were) and is now wondering if they got pg before it was too late and they regretted not having kids. Should I continue to wait and see what DH says next? I can tell it's been on his mind most of the weekend. I do still really want kids, but I've kind of tried to be okay about it if we don't have them, but with his coach and wife now having a baby I think this presents the perfect opportunity for another discussion on the topic. Any advice?