How to blend and share bedrooms?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2013
How to blend and share bedrooms?
Wed, 08-28-2013 - 4:56pm

I've been dating a woman for a while who is great and we are getting on well.  She has two daugters 7 & 10, and I have two daughters 7 and 11.  Things look like they are going to get serious and long-term. I haven't met her kids yet and she hasn't met mine. I haven't dated women with kids in years and this has now brought up some interesting questions.

1) My kids live 600 miles away and typically only visit and maybe one month in the summer and one week around christmas. I go visit them when I have time off or if there is something special event. How do we make sure my kids feel included?

2) If I and this woman were to marry down the road. Its likely they would move into the house I currently own. 3bedrm 2.5 baths. And given how my DDs may only be at my house for 5 weeks total out of the year. Do I keep one room reserved for them year round and make my GFs girls share one room? Her girls will likely be with us fulltime and at their dad's every other weekend, some holidays and half of the summer. Feels like I'll be running a hotel.

It would likely take a couple years for us to get enough money to move to a bigger house. Would we really need one? How have other folks dealt with these situations?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2011
Fri, 09-06-2013 - 1:57pm

Even though your daughters aren't there that much, you should keep a room in your house for them. It's not going to kill the other girls to share a room, a lot of siblings have to do that. They need to know that they are an important part of your life and need to feel like they belong when they visit. You don't want them feeling like outsiders.