Mom of teen feeling like an afterthought
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|Sun, 12-22-2013 - 4:23pm|
My son is 19 and a high school Senior. His dad and I have been divorced for 9 years. Dad is remarried with a 3 yr old and I'm still single. For a while now I've felt like my son would rather be with his dad vs me. We all have a great relationship and when my son and I are together we have a good time. We've never followed a traditional custody agreement. It always been a 50/50 schedule each week; even after our son started to drive.
I have asked my ex and my son if there is any reason why he tends to be at dad's more and neither of them say that there is any reason why. We pretty much follow the schedule, but if he has a choice, he is at his dad's. Logically, I know that teens really don't want to be with either parent and would rather be with friends, but its just little things. Like, for example, I was out of town for 2 weeks for work (very unusual for me). I picked him up on Friday and we spent time together Friday, and Christmas shopping on Saturday. Today he did Christmas with his gf's family and he's headed back to his dad's. Why not just be here after? As I said, I've talked to him and he swears there is no reason why. I really try to not take it personally, but I do. I feel like I make little comments and I hate doing that to him.
Is he just being a boy and would prefer to be at dad's? Is he not giving it much thought at all? Is there something I'm doing? Or am I overthinking this?
I feel terrible and have been crying about it a lot lately. I really want to know how to handle this and move on from it.