Happy Birthday Nik!!
Kathy, she's 14. She's had a horrible time this past yr. last night I didn't do a cake because the family is coming over on Sunday. I gave her some of her gifts. I feel so bad for her I just may go buy those ripped jeans she wants in Aeropostle.
I don't know exactly how dh feels about it all because he doesn't say much. My boys have been so good to her since she was born & been there for her. My younger son is paying for her tutor in math because we just don't have the money right now. The boys called yesterday to wish her happy bday & so did dil. Oldest called 3 times till he got us home. This is one area I don't know what to say to her & I'm afraid of saying the wrong thing. Nik keeps things to herself just like dh does so she can be hard to read at times.
2 friends asked if they can come over for her bday & I told her this morning to tell them its ok. If I knew before yesterday I would have let her have a few girls over Friday night or saturday. I'm happy she's making friends & they asked to come.
As for your situation, E wants to show off the bay which is natural & she most likely doesn't have the animosity that M has because M remebers more & resents more that her bio did. I find that true w/my 2 boys. My oldest tolerates dad & my youngest just rolls w/it all. How long will you be back for? How is your mom doing?
Gwen, your not late w/this. Nik's having a very hard time w/biodad. of all the people in the world she would have he wouldn't have even made the list. He's the only person we've known that she never liked.
He's been texting her & telling her how much he loves her. he wants to talk to her just the two of them alone. Dh told Nik no way she can talk to him only if he's there also. Biodad makes up stories of his life to suit whatever he wants at the time, he constantly lies & dh isn't going to let him lie to Nik. If Nik wants to talk w/him she can but only w/dh there. She's getting upset by all his texts & if he doesn't back off I may get his phone number blocked. Nik has way too much to deal w/at the moment & school is difficult for her this yr. she made that change in the middle of the yr. & this school is very tough & gives a load of homework. She doesn't need any more stress then she has at this time & if he can't respect this then we're going to have a big problem.
Nik's too sensitive for her own good & always puts other peoples feelings ahead of hers. She worries about hurting feelings. I told dh she needs to go spend time w/my sister because my sister always has put herself 1st before everyone including her kids & she's much better off for it today. The therapist told me we have raised a wonderful young lady who is caring & sweet & wants to do the right thing, we should be proud. Well sometimes I think Nik would be better off if she just said what she thought & the heck w/everyones feelings.
I don't know why God brought her into our lives but I know I love her more than I ever thought was possible. I also know that as far as FAS & I know the amount of alcohol her biomom consummed every single day she doesn't have many problems. As I tell Nik God protected her from that alcohol & He has plans for her, good plans for her & so she nneds to remeber that.
My younger ds believes that my dh would not be alive today if it wasn't for Nik, he belives that dh fought to stay alive for her the whole time he was in the hospital.