Update

Avatar for coellis
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Update
10
Thu, 11-05-2009 - 12:14am

A week has passed.

 

Avatar for gemini42
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: coellis
Thu, 11-05-2009 - 7:02pm

Colleen,


Everything will fall into place in time, it doesn't happen overnight.

Fran

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2007
In reply to: coellis
Fri, 11-06-2009 - 1:49am

Hi Colleen...


Sounds like all went very well...and congratulations on a new granddaughter and great grand baby to be.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2009
In reply to: coellis
Fri, 11-06-2009 - 8:41am

Colleen things will get easier in time & going on a vacation to Arizona is just what you need. Your mom lived a good long life & had you around her caring for her in her last yrs & I know that gave her great joy.


Not knowing what to do w/yourself is normal but you will find things to do in time. As for the house I guess that was always a question. Will your sis & bil want to sell? Its a lousy ecomony right now so I would think not. Will they realize you may not be able to afford it? Maybe they will help because if you move they will have an empty house that may not sell for a long time. You & your family need time to sort all this out, I'm sure your sis & bil are wondering the same things you are about the house.


Gotta give that boy you raised credit, he sure knows how to treat a girl. maybe having no male role model is a good thing he has shown nothing but responsibility & has a good sense for other peoples feelings. Can you give a hint how you did this?


Take one day at a time & everything will fall into place. Give yourself time to grieve & know & understand you will never stop missing her it just gets easier w/time to not hurt as much.


You never mentioned your dd was she there?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2007
In reply to: coellis
Fri, 11-06-2009 - 12:50pm

I don't know what to say - it seems that time should stop, but


Kathy

Avatar for coellis
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: coellis
Fri, 11-06-2009 - 2:45pm

Thank you all for being the sweet people that you are.

 

Avatar for coellis
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: coellis
Fri, 11-06-2009 - 6:34pm
Well, it happened.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2009
In reply to: coellis
Fri, 11-06-2009 - 7:54pm

Sorry Colleen, I know that must have hurt. My dad insisted on seeing my moms dug don't know why but he just had to.


You mentioned you want to be cremated, do you have plans for your ashes afterwards? Dh's mom was cremated but she didn't leave any instructions except a promise from me that she would not ever go back to Maine. She has stayed w/us for 20 yrs. after the 1st yr. in maine

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2007
In reply to: coellis
Fri, 11-06-2009 - 11:31pm

There's a lot to be said for sitting down and discussing arrangements.


Kathy

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2009
In reply to: coellis
Sat, 11-07-2009 - 10:38am
Kathy, I missed that somehow about Colleens dd. She is afraid she might die & in this instance I think maybe a ride to the hospital might be the right thing to do.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2009
In reply to: coellis
Sat, 11-07-2009 - 10:48am

Colleen, I know you have been thru H$%^^ and back w/your dd & you have givin up on her ever turning her lofe around. There are some things we can't change no matter how much we would like to & I think you have accepted that. I have had to accept that my ds who I always thought the world of & was there for has changed since dil, the hurt & things that man said to me while dh was in the hospital not once but 3 times broke something in me & I can't seem to get back the feelings I had for him. Most likely never will. He got hurt playing hockey about a month ago & had to have seventeen stitches in his mouth, teeth in question etc. he stopped by the next day mostly I think to let us know. The next day dh asked me how ds was doing & I told him I hadn't called to ask because the thought never crossed my mind to but dh could which he did. I think that in itself says it all.


I can understand how you feel about your dd but in this instance giving her a ride to the hospital seems to be the right thing to do, at least you will know in your heart that you did all you could do for her if something bad should happen. If she refuses your ride I don't think there is anything you can do about it at that point.


My 2 cents.

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