Feeling used - what would you do?
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|Tue, 02-09-2010 - 2:34pm|
I am totally fed up because it seems to me that my SD is everyones priority and if I don't play ball I get sarky comments from MIL.
The truth is when I was more involved it was appreciated, infact I was TOLD that it wasn't fair on me to do so much. Any time I spent with SD on her own was stopped by bioparent/s.
Consequently because I was aa key player in the blended family, we saw less and less of SD. Basically I used to mind SD if her dad was at work. SD only sees us if her dad is around and because he gets hardly any whole weekends off it's not that often. Plus as a couple we want to spend weekends together doing our own thing.
Roll on 3 yrs SD is 11 and my input is required again. And if I don't want/can't I'm made to feel bad. No one noticed or cared to ask why we saw SD less and less and no one asked me what I thought. When I mean no one I mean my inlaws.
The problem isn't with SD, she's a good kid. I just feel used. Is it wrong to develop a bond with SD, because I did when we spent so much time together. DH said my presence brought him and DD closer. It was literally as soon as we returned from our honeymoon that my input in SDs life was restricted.
Anyway now my input is required again and I'm not sure what to do.
I still get on with SD so I could start to rebuild our relationship to how it was before or I could think once bitten twice shy and refuse.
I'm still pretty cross about being cast aside and having no control over that and that is what makes me think 'no why should I be picked up again because it suits everyone else' just because it's finally been realised that actually I am a key player in this blended family'.
I haven't really had an apology for how this has bothered me. Infact I get the impression that as a SM I don't have or shouldn't have feelings for a non-bio child.
What would you do?