SS-to-be jealous of DS and DH-to-be

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2010
SS-to-be jealous of DS and DH-to-be
6
Thu, 03-25-2010 - 12:29pm

Hi everyone first post here but have a feeling not the last.


A little background first. I am 36 and have a son 10 years old that never knew is father (parental rights terminated when son was 6 months old) I haven't had a relationship since that I felt good enough about to introduce my son to until now.


My boyfriend was a boy I dated around my Junior Prom. And after twenty years we have gotten back together and are extremely happy

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-18-2007
Tue, 03-30-2010 - 8:35am

Yep. Your son gets to spend a lot of time with this child's father; of course he's jealous.


I can't offer much except that you need to decide if this situation is one that can improve, or one that will get worse. Then you'll know what to do. Good luck!

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&nb
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2010
Wed, 04-07-2010 - 10:16am

Thanks. We have talked and think things will get better. Its just really new for everyone.


I did get worried about it and stayed away for a few days just to clear my head and think about things. I feel that a situation like this with the children involved has to be handled so carefully that I didn't want to mess anything up. The second day I was gone was one of the days he had visitation with the children and his son called me up and asked to talk with me. He apologized for what happened and said he knew what he did was wrong. He also asked that my son and I come back because he missed us, loves us and wants my son to be his brother and his Dad to be my son's Dad. He had me very choked up, to say the least. But like I said I didn't want to push things, so I told him that we loved him too and that we would come out the next day to talk. We did go out and talk and things are starting to go alot better.


I think its just a matter of time, patience and love.


Thanks again.


Sue

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2009
Wed, 04-07-2010 - 5:12pm

**One of the things that made us wonder what part of his problem is (and I say part because they were having problems with him for years before they were divorced or we were involved) He commented to the investigator and this is a direct quote "My dad spends 19% of his time with me, 51% with Brett(my DS), and 29% with my sister"

Real SM's use Jazz Hands
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2010
Wed, 04-07-2010 - 5:39pm

He is going to a phsycologist (sp?). BM kept dragging her feet on having him go but after this last issue she finally gave in and agreed to have him see some one.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2009
Wed, 04-07-2010 - 5:54pm

***He is going to a phsycologist (sp?). BM kept dragging her feet on having him go but after this last issue she finally gave in and agreed to have him see some one.**


That's good! :)

Real SM's use Jazz Hands
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-18-2007
Wed, 04-07-2010 - 6:31pm
No problem. I'm glad things are looking up :)

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&nb