Am I the weird one....

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2003
Am I the weird one....
6
Wed, 07-29-2009 - 1:44pm
or is it everyone else? lol Ok, well, not *everyone* else. But some discussions on the message board for my playgroup IRL have got me wondering. I don't seem to be as attached to Keenan as other moms are to their kids. Maybe "attached" isn't the right word. I love love love K, and I wouldn't want to not be his mom. But, for example, I had no problems or guilt about sending him to moms' day out last fall, whereas at least one mom in our playgroup does. (This mom is also pg with their second child and feels guilty about having a second baby b/c it means that their first one won't get all the attention anymore, etc.) I have no problems leaving him with a sitter-- I know he'll survive and won't be permanently scarred by him being away from us for a few hours, but some of my mommy friends can't stand having their kids spend the night away from home w/grandparents (one of whom literally lives three houses away!) b/c they miss their kids too much. I've spent two nights away from him, and while I did miss him, it wasn't enough to make me want to run back to him right then! Some moms seem perfectly happy to take their kids with them everywhere they go, even to their hair stylists, but I feel like I need time alone and I get cranky if I don't get it. Am I too selfish?
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Avatar for suzyk2118
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-1997
Wed, 07-29-2009 - 7:26pm

I'm guilty about being one of the 'everyone', at least preschool; after that then I figured legally he had to be there so I didn't feel as guilty. As he's aged these feelings have passed; maybe because I felt I knew I had to work I had those feelings? I wish I didn't; it didn't make life easy!

Sue

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-03-2005
Wed, 07-29-2009 - 7:50pm

nope, I don't think you're weird at all ;-) Granted I brought DD to daycare at 7 weeks old and it tore me up but I got used to it, and my alone time. It was nice to do things without dragging her around with me. I have no problem getting a sitter for her (which we rarely do) and she likes having a sitter or going to Grandma's when we have something to do that would be too boring for her.

I need my space from her AND from my DH. With us working together we spend all together too much time together! lol I'm going for a girl's weekend away starting Friday and I'm soooooo looking forward to it. :) My b-day is Sunday so it's a b-day treat. My Girl friend just turned 40 on the 25th so it's a belated b-day gift to herself also. :)

Anyway, I've never had a problem sending Paige to places I knew she would have fun at and learn. The only reason she got pulled out of Daycare at 3 was her biting that we couldn't get to stop. After that she went into 1/2 day preschool and kinder and now that she's in school I miss her but enjoy our time together that much more. :)

Jodi

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2009
Wed, 07-29-2009 - 8:12pm
I don't find your actions odd in the least!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2002
Thu, 07-30-2009 - 9:02am

No, you're not selfish.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2005
Thu, 07-30-2009 - 9:42am

Nope.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Thu, 07-30-2009 - 10:31am

I don't think it's weird or selfish to want and need some time to yourself. Nothing wrong with taking care of yourself, and some time away from Mommy is a good thing for kids as well.

We do a LOT together as a family, but dh and I both like to go do our own thing sometimes and we definitely look forward to getting out just the two of us now and then.

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