Expectations of a 9 year old Boy

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-04-2008
Expectations of a 9 year old Boy
7
Fri, 07-04-2008 - 1:14pm

Hi everyone, I am new here and I am hoping that you guys can give me some advice.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2007
Fri, 07-04-2008 - 2:52pm

Maybe you could try a checklist in the bathroom? Just on a little laminated piece of paper or something. He could at least mentally check off each step as he goes. After a couple of times of following the checklist, maybe it would become second nature... Same would go for cleaning his room -- sometimes it helps to spell out the expectations very clearly, step-by-step.

My 12 year old STILL forgets to take his own towel with him and ends up using one of ours half the time, grrr.... But the good news is, is he finally WANTS to take a shower, completely on his own... When they discover girls, they start to care a bit more about hygiene, LOL.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 07-04-2008 - 3:18pm

I'm going to second the suggestion of a checklist for both the bathroom/shower time and cleaning his room. I think the checklist will help him remember each step he is suppose to do and it won't be you or your so constantly nagging him. I would even say at 9 he could help make the lists.

I think it might help if you have him do a quick check to make sure the bathroom floor is clean and dry after his shower. Some water is going to get on the floor when you take a shower or a bath. The problem occurs when it isn't wiped up.

I would also suggest stop fighting him about taking a shower nightly. Tell him if he doesn't take the shower without a fuss then he doesn't get to do x, y or z tomorrow and that is the end of it. You are not discussing it with him each night, he know he needs to take a shower nightly so it is not a surprise. If he refuses to stop fighting it then he has decided that he wants to give up something; its his choice but he will be taking a bath. I'd remind him that its bath time and if he complains give him a reminder that he will lose x, y or z tomorrow if he doesn't get in there. But I'd also make sure I wasn't setting him up to fail by asking him to take his bath right away when he was in the middle of something; he would get time to finish up what he was doing but not start something new.

dawn200608.jpg picture by cariadlawn


Avatar for bradleyteach
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2001
Sat, 07-05-2008 - 8:13am

I'm sorry if this sounds snarky, but requiring a 10 step shower is a sign of obsessive-compulsive disorder, and you need to be able to forfeit some control.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2004
Wed, 07-09-2008 - 1:03am

I agree,

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 07-10-2008 - 1:52pm
Yikes! I don't even want to think about the teen years but I know they are not that far away.

dawn200608.jpg picture by cariadlawn


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2004
Wed, 07-16-2008 - 11:12am

I'm 30 years older than your son and I'm afraid I'd forget some of those rules.


Additionally, why 9 year olds don't have all of those memorized after doing it every day is the same reason they don't have multiplication tables memorized after going over it once or twice. Kids need things repeated to learn it, they just do.


Moreover, there's

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2005
Wed, 07-16-2008 - 2:30pm