What grade will you let your kids get up and ready for school by themselves?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2011
What grade will you let your kids get up and ready for school by themselves?
5
Wed, 07-17-2013 - 1:49pm

This has been on my mind lately, since my kids are getting older- they will be entering 4th and 8th grade this year. I still get up with them on school mornings to make sure they are getting out to the bus stop on time. But I'm starting to wonder if I'm "babying" them by doing this? At what age/grade should they be responsible enough to set an alarm and get themselves ready for school?

I have memories of getting myself ready for school each morning but I can't remember how old I was. I remember that I would have to wake my mom up before I left each morning to tell her what I was wearing. She had this fear that I'd get kidnapped or something and she wanted to be able to tell the police what I was wearing that day, I guess.  Laughing

Lisa 

Community Leader
Registered: 07-26-1999

Jordyn was getting up and ready completely on her own in 5th grade.  For a year or two before that I would get her up, and she got herself ready, lunch packed etc., but in 5th grade when we moved to Texas, I had an hour commute to my job and DH had to be to base around the same time, so she got up, got ready and got on the bus on her own.  I am thinking that this year when Emma starts first grade we will get her an alarm clock.  I normally wake her up as I am leaving the house in the morning, and DH needs to be up also to get ready for work and put her on the bus, but it can't hurt to get her in the habit of at least waking up with her own alarm.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2003

Let me put it this way my DH is 39 and I STILL have to get him up. Its annoying, my MIL takes some blame. I told him and my almost 10 year they both have to help me more this fall and waking up with my pestering is one of those things. I will say my oldest tries, he was obsesed awhile back with getting up when I get up and tried setting the alarm on his ipod but half the time he has the volume down. I am going to look into an alarm for their room.

I really don't remember the age I did that but I do think by my oldest age I was picking out my own clothes but while on weekends i will send him up to pick out clothes I just don't trust him for school plus I don't always get to put the clothes away. Many mornings I am running down stairs to grab laundry I haven't had a chance to bring up. First week of camp this summer I was getting organized and picked 5 days worth of clothes for both kids. Great theroy did good first week but haven't done it since plus weather not that reliable to trust its still going to what they say it will be by end of week. My goal this school is to have the clothes ready night before (again great in theory but weeknights just as crazy as weekday mornings so we will see)

I will admit I babied my first. Think i was dressing still in 2nd grade (might have been first but really think it was midway through 2nd I realized he probably should be doing this himself). My 4 year old will dress himself sometimes but next year he needs to wear a uniform so not sure he will be able to button and buckle and tuck everything to meet school standard at 4. But guess get your shirt and pants on and mom can do finishing touches can help.

Its like it would help me if they did get up and ready on their own but if everything does happen by a certain time we miss our bus and then we will all be late, so the control freak in my needs to make sure they are up at x time and dressed at x time and since my DH can't do it I just don't trust my kids...

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Avatar for cmlisab
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2011

Arryl- that is awesome that your DD was doing it completely on her own by 5th grade! As you can see, my kids are quite behind! I wonder, though, if they HAD to do it (like if both parents had to leave as well for work), they would/could do it.

Liamsmom724- I seriously could have written what you wrote! I also dressed my kids (mostly my youngest) waayyy longer than I should have- it was easier and quicker. I also know that at the core of this, is my inability to trust my kids to do this! I definitely need to work on this. But it's like you said, if they miss the bus, it's a huge PITA and it throws everyone's morning off. 

But I sure would love that extra sleep in the mornings! Unfortunately, even if I get brave and try this with just my oldest son (14), it still won't save me any sleep b/c my youngest son is at a different school with a much earlier start time. 

I'll let you know how it goes if I do try it with  my oldest. It will probably just be me pretending to be "sleeping" but really glancing at the clock, fretting every few minutes until he gets out the door on time, LOL!

Community Leader
Registered: 07-26-1999

Lisa, is your oldest going to be in high school this year or does he have 1 more year of middle school? Remember in 4-5 short years (and believe me, it goes by much faster than you think), he'll be off to college and NEEDS to have the ability to do all of this on his own.

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Community Leader
Registered: 06-27-2006
I'm pretty sure Tyler and Kristen were in Jr High..7th and 8th and could get up and going on their own. Kolby will be in 5th grade this year, and I still have to get him up, but he's on his own after that. Riley.....he's 'the baby' so, I still dress him. Yes, he's 6 years old and cannot tie his own shoes. lol!