Accidentally catching son masturbating

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2003
Accidentally catching son masturbating
34
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 1:17pm
Well what I kind if knew was inevitable happened last week. I went into my DS's room to get his laundry and when I opened the door, there he was, on his bed in all his glory, masturbating. I usually knock first but I was busy thinking about what I was going to make for dinner and didn't realize that I didn't knock. Anyway, there was not much he could do but turn beet red. I just said, sorry, and quickly left. I knew that he masturbated and truthfully I wasn't even embarrassed. I guess that I was more amused (I have always been amused that boys could never control that part of their bodies), than anything else, though I never let him know that.
Anyway, later when he came down for dinner, he couldn't look me in the eye. After about 5 minutes of silence, he apoligized and asked me if I was angry. My short answer was, no, but that we would talk about it after dinner. I also apologized to him for not knocking. To make a long story short, I told him that I wasn't angry, that it was normal, natural, all boys and most girls do it. I also told him that I knew he had been doing it for a while. When I told my best friend, with whom I have no secrets, about this, she told me that she has almost caught her son on several ocassions. He would quickly cover up and be sweating and red.
Have any of you ever caught or almost caught your son masturbating? My impression is that it's NOT that uncommon.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2004
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 7:30pm

A kid or adult posting? Does it matter? LOL
I'm still wondering why someone would ask others of their children's caught-in-the-act masturbation experiences, then press for details?
ALL boys have been masturbating since the dawn of time. Is this topical?

Sorry Deb. If you're for real, I do hope your son did not pick up on your amusement. It's embarrassing for them enough.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2006
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 7:42pm

Deleted cause obviously we're bad moms for discussing this... sheesh.

zz




Edited 3/22/2007 6:29 am ET by cat.smack
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2006
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 7:48pm

Maybe it's a mother's thing. Don't be so harsh.

zz

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2003
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 8:13pm
Sorry, but I never asked for experiences or details.
All I asked was if they ever caught their sons.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2006
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 8:29pm

Haha! You got more than you bargained for when I replied, huh?! Oh well!

zz

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2000
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 8:51pm

We do tend to get the bored teens during break talking about sex, which was why many of us probably jumped to conclusions about your post.

Pam
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 9:21pm

I'm with you Pam on the amusement factor (I'd be horribly embarrassed to have intruded on something so private) but also about posting about it. How would a parent feel if their child walked in on them and a spouse or partner having sex, and then went and posted about the experience on myspace? I know there are a lot of negative things to be said about my space, that don't apply to this board, but I do think the comparison is valid.

Just because they are our children, and minor children at that, doesn't mean that we have full license to share everything about them with even good friends. By virtue of living in the same house (and in our case, a rather SMALL house), family members often see and hear things that should, IMHO, remain in the family. One of the ways that parents can easily loose the trust of their children is when the children find out that the parent has been talking about something sensitive outside of the family. Sometimes I think it's all too easy to forget that our kids aren't our possessions or extensions of us, but people in their own right who get insulted, embarrassed and hurt feelings. And very often, much more easily than adults do.
Rose

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2006
Thu, 03-22-2007 - 6:37am

It wouldn't bother me at all if DS saw us having sex and posted it on his MySpace page. Why should it?

But since you, Pam and Daddio have decided we're so out of line and betraying our children, and well, basically being "bad moms", I'm out of here for awhile.

Pretty judgemental, if you ask me. Does C know you post about her, and some of your feelings towards her? Pam, does your son know you've posted something so private as his eating disorder? That seems something very personal to me.

zz --> says adios

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
Thu, 03-22-2007 - 6:53am
Never said you were a bad mom cat, in fact, I think just the opposite. However, posting details of accidentally catching a child masturbating smacks a bit of voyeurism to me, and I'm not into that, especially when it comes to minors/children. I stand by my opinion (and it's just that, an opinion) in my previous post.
Rose
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2006
Thu, 03-22-2007 - 7:08am

<<>>

Well, I'm not sure where I've been offended the most.

voyeurism: the practice of obtaining sexual gratification by looking at sexual objects or acts, esp. secretively.

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt here, cause otherwise I'd start throwing up.

zz