Am I Being Unreasonable?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2011
Am I Being Unreasonable?
Mon, 03-14-2011 - 7:56am

First of all hello everyone, this is my first posting.

I have a teen, just gone 19 on Saturday. He is very hard work, has been for years, very argumentative, wont lift a finger in the house, I could go on and on. The problem is his girlfriend. We love her to bits she really is no trouble at all but we take exception to her staying/living at our house week after week so we have put our foot down and sad she can only stay at weekends. He has gone beserk, telling me he would rather be locked up in a police cell than live her, that he hates it here and that he wants his own place. Am I really being a bad person here???

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2010
Tue, 03-15-2011 - 1:55pm
My oldest ds is 18 1/2 and still lives at home, works full time, and cost wise he has not had the money to move out yet, and this is fine so far. I don't think you are being unreasonable! Put your foot down about the gf, they are too young to be playing house under your roof. There is no way I would allow any gf to stay over on any nights at our house, that and my ds still shares a room with his brother who is 17. Your ds needs to learn more respect for you and your household, period! Otherwise as someone else pointed out, help him to start circling ads for apartments!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-14-2011 - 8:20pm

You are letting him walk all over you; stand up!

You are 100% correct and within your rights and not at all a bad person

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Mon, 03-14-2011 - 6:42pm

I'd be helping him pack up his things and circling the apt. ads in the paper so he can get exactly what he wants.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
Mon, 03-14-2011 - 2:12pm

Actually, the problem isn't just the GF, it's your son. At 19, he should be doing work around the house, and if he's not in school, should be working and paying you rent.

Avatar for suzyk2118
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-1997
Mon, 03-14-2011 - 9:14am
You didn't mention -is your ds in college at home? Working FT? Is there a reason he shouldn't have a place of his own at 19? Just trying to get more background.