any advice on teens making collage decis

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2005
any advice on teens making collage decis
11
Sun, 03-04-2007 - 11:01pm
ds 17 we thought he had it down what he was going to school for and choice of the two collages. he has been offered a schoolarship of 10,000.00 per year at the one collage and was accepted into the computer science program at both schools...he has been seeing this girl for about 3 months and comes home tonight from her house telling me he thinks that he has made a decision on what he wants to do about school...said he wants to go to school between Pennsylvania (home) and NJ because his girlfriend he found out next month is moving to NJ and he wants to go to school near where she is living. i can tell when he was telling me he was paying very close attention to my reaction and asked what i thought...i told him that i don't think he should base his collage decision on where a girlfriend of three months will be living. ... and his reaction was...well, the way i feel right now is i want to be near her and i will go to a collage that i can take my core classes and it doesn't matter where i go as long as i get my education. i tried to explain to him that if he lived at home he would not have all of those expenses ... he said that i took care of him all through hs and grade school and now he needs to do this....i chose to let this conversation kind of linger off because i am hoping that this was just a decision he made tonight after finding out she was moving and he will wake up w/i the next few months and realize differently. What is your opinions.? Does it ever end? arrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2006
Thu, 03-08-2007 - 12:28pm

I think that your son would be making a horrible mistake if he went to a school just to be close to his girlfriend. Especially if he worked so hard for another school or if the school closer to the girlfriend is not as good. It really saddens me when I see kids do that. My son is a freshman in college now, but I remember one of his friends dreamed of Yale their whole lives, but did not go because their boyfriend was going to stay on the west coast. They broke up 2 months later and the girl hates the school that she is going to. I will be furious with my daughter if she drops her dreams of either going to Stanford or an Ivy-league school because her boyfriend is still in California. Granted her boyfriend of a year and a 1/2 goes to the best public college in CA, I would still be angry with her and we would have to renegotiate the payment plan.

Your son should not throw away his dreams for his girlfriend. If they are going to "last forever" then it shouldn't matter where they live. I wish the best of luck to your son.

Adelaide

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