bad/rude friend

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2007
bad/rude friend
3
Thu, 08-09-2007 - 4:11pm


Good afternoon everyone!

I have a situation - my son's friend is rude and inconsiderate. He doesn't act that way when he comes to my house, but I can tell it in the way that he talks to his mother and the way their household is run. My son knows what he can and cannot do whether he is in or out of the house.

I allow him to go to his friends house and spend the night but after I started seeing how he deals with his mother, I'm beginning to rethink allowing him to do so. I have taught him about respect, right and wrong, and who is the parent and who is the child. I have absolutely no problems out of him, thank the Lord, but I don't like the idea of the possible influence this child may have on him outside of the home.

I would simply start restriciting the amount of time outside of the home he can spend with this kid, but here's the problem - I am really good friends with his mother and they live in our building. Kind of hard to get away from that. I'm not really sure how to handle this one, but I'm beginning not to like him being around this boy.

Thanks!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-09-2007 - 4:24pm

I think by the time they reach their teens, they need to learn to hold true to their own upbringing in matters like this. When they are younger, I think there can be a monkey see, monkey do reaction but, assuming he is a teen, he is old enough to distinguish that different houses have different rules

If you think the parent is allowing drinking or going out after curfew while the boys are there, then you would have to stop the sleepovers but IMO if it's just 'tone' and 'language', I wouldn't worry

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2007
Thu, 08-09-2007 - 4:38pm


My son is 12, not exactly a teen, however at his age I am comfortable with his behavior and maturity level, but I also know how impressionable they can be.

I'm going to post this topic in the preteen section and see what type of advice I receive.

Thanks!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
Thu, 08-09-2007 - 7:08pm

Even though your DS is only 12, I think he's probably old enough to understand right from wrong, especially when it's things like how to treat you, and what's rude and what's not.